| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| jerica |
Posted - 03/04/2010 : 08:15:13
I have a bit of a problem speaking freely with my therapists (wow I think I just uncovered a bit of the underlying cause of my throat constriction and stuff). I feel like they talk down to me, I feel diminished when I talk to them as if they are the adult and I am the child and they don't respect me. I am afraid to say when I think they're wrong. I listen to everything and sometimes in my head I'm saying how ludicrous or out of whack it is but I don't SAY it.
I got really irritated recently while listening to a therapist, and I'd felt that way about a year and a half or so ago when I had a different therapist. I have had 5 therapists since 2005 and the best one of them I can't afford (at least HE agreed that all my symptoms are emotional/mental and would not waver from that but I can't pay the 185 an hour anymore).
My thoughts during the session were as follows:
- You're talking too much, I should be talking.
- I'm paying you to listen to me, not tell me about your husband/vacation/other patients/making soup/TV shows you've seen/what docs on TV say/what Oprah says
- You're completely wrong and I know more about this subject than you do
- You're stupid.
- Shut up.
- You don't get it at all.
- Are you a real therapist? How did you ever graduate?
- I hate you
- You're talking to me like I'm your child. I may be anxious and vulnerable but I'm still an adult.
- Why are you talking like I have heart disease and should get more testing when I need you to be strong and tell me that I shouldn't even CONSIDER getting more tests?
- Why are you just mirroring my fears back to me and I'm leaving your office feeling more fearful and vulnerable than when I came in?
- This is a waste of my time and money.
- I'm better off reading a book.
I don't SAY any of this. Never ever. I'm really friendly and bubbly and have "trained" myself to be that way for the comfort of others. I always smile, I always laugh, I always try to put people at ease. If they say something I think is stupid I just say "Hmm, that's interesting I'll have to look into/find/try that." or if they say something I KNOW is wrong then 99% of the time I won't correct them I'll just let them continue thinking they're right.
My therapist recently mentioned Sarno and I said he wrote The Divided Mind and she said that she wasn't aware of a book of his by that name. Ok fair enough, but inside my head I'm thinking she should know this, and why won't she just take MY word for it instead of contradicting me. Why isn't SHE being as accommodating as I am? Why AM I being so accomodating, anyway?
My work emails are always peppered with smileys :) and exclamation points like this:
"Thanks!"
"Thanks so much:)"
and so on. I look at other people's emails and theirs say:
"Regards,"
"Thanks."
and so on. To me that is decidedly less "friendly" looking. I think people will think I'm angry with them if I don't make it look light and fluffy.
I accommodate people a lot, which is weird because I'm stubborn as an ox. The thing is that I hold all my stubbornness inside and don't tell people off. I go home and tell my hubby about what I really think and feel. I don't tell the people who irritated me etc.
Even when I go to the doctor I have a nervous laugh and I'm always joking about everything. I don't know if anyone takes me seriously. Maybe they can see through the smiling and joking and laughing. My mother has this nervous laugh thing, too. I think when she says something she doesn't want to say she tacks this little "Heh heh" at the end of it. I used to point it out to her and we'd laugh about it because it is really funny when you think about it. She'd say, "I'm not going to have enough money to eat and I'll be out on the street heh heh" or "I don't know what to do, I should have stayed in the convent heh heh" "When you're old no one cares about you, heh heh"
I can't figure that out but I do it constantly and have been for a while. I seem to mimic her a lot.
Anyway, how to YOU talk to your therapist if you have one? Do you ever get in arguments with them? Do you tell them off or cry in front of them or tell them how you really feel or do you mask things like I do? I wear a mask all the time when I'm with people and it feels really unauthentic and fake but I don't do it to "dupe" people, I'm just afraid they won't accept me as I am and what I really think. |
| 20 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| art |
Posted - 06/09/2011 : 04:54:30
Trouble is, that would probably disqualify most of the client population. I don't think anyone this side of God can be absolutely honest. Then of course there's often the question about what the truth actually is. That's not always easy to figure out.
I'd say that if you're not willing to *try* to be as honest as you can, you probably won't benefit much from therapy. |
| Dave |
Posted - 06/08/2011 : 10:28:08
IMO if you cannot be 100% honest with your therapist you should not be in therapy. |
| Joy_I_Am |
Posted - 06/08/2011 : 02:46:27
Responding to on old post here, because I was very struck by what Yogaluz said - that thing about 'pasting on a smile' for your therapist - absolutely! Pretending you're getting better, because you know that's what the therapist wants... and all the people-pleasing patterns, and falling into the mother dynamic if it's a woman, etc etc. Yes, c'est moi!
I haven't had long-term therapy, just short-term counselling when I did a college course, and then for anxiety on the NHS (took 12 months to get it, hooray NHS). I found it helpful to be speaking out about my issues, and one counsellor told me I was sleep-deprived, which I had been, uh, too sleep-deprived to notice, heh. Also, I tend very much to isolate, so it was good simply to put some shoes on and get out of the house! So it was good in that respect.
But ultimately, I feel I'm better off journalling, because I am honest there. There's always a self-protective mechanism which kicks in with a counsellor. Also, my last one made some comment about her cleaner, calling her 'my little woman', and that is something that sets my teeth on edge - looking down on someone for the job they do. My mother was a cleaner, I've cleaned bathrooms for a living. All work is honourable, and it just undermined all my trust in this snotty woman.
I like Julia Cameron's Morning Pages; the fact you write three pages means that you might start off resistant, but eventually you bash through to something, and you can be as wild and go as deep as you like, and don't have to stop when the hour's up!
But other people might feel the need for guidance, and that's fine too, it's horses for courses; this is just my take on it. |
| jerica |
Posted - 03/08/2010 : 22:06:57
I think a therapist should meet your needs, after all that's what you pay them for. Now being dependent on them probably isn't a good idea but I think most people probably are dependent on the therapist when they first begin therapy or for a few months while they learn coping skills and learn to be independent. Now I had a therapist for ten years whom I saw about 2 times a month and then I moved away and didn't see any therapists at all for about 5 years til I relapsed and started in with panicking again. So all in all I was independent at that time due to having learned coping skills and becoming functional. Problem is that I relapsed and unlearned a lot of stuff and let the symptoms take precedence. |
| gav |
Posted - 03/07/2010 : 20:52:03
It seems to me that you are always looking for a therapist to be dependent on and to meet your needs, rather than working to become independent.
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| jerica |
Posted - 03/07/2010 : 19:55:04
I think it is because I did make great strides from being completely non functional and hospitalized at age 17 to being functional with the ability to go across the country in an Amtrak for 3 days and get a job in a state I'd never been in before which I attribute to my wonderful therapist in NYC whom I saw for about ten years that I keep looking for another therapist who can do what he did. The work was all mine of course but HE was an excellent guide. That's what I needed, support and guidance and that's what I'm not finding so much in these other therapists. |
| mcone |
Posted - 03/07/2010 : 10:47:11
@Catspine...
We are probably all in agreement on this.
My sense is that the journey and the goals are two dimensions to the same thing.
Goals are what we identify as the "ports of call" for our life journey. If we identify them correctly (or at least somewhat correctly), they inspire us and guide us in directions that are compatible with our own emotional, spiritual or tempermental makeup - the core "themes" that make us who we are. [Presumably, although we are constantly modifying our goals or creating new ones, there are core themes at play that may not really change throughout our lives.]
Reaching goals (ot least reaching goals that are right for us), informs us that we have been inevsting our life energy in healthy, life-affirming ways. And even if we don't completely reach all our goals or reach goals we later learn were not meant for us, we still have the opportunity to reflect upon that life experience as worthwhile (assuming, of course, that we haven't been deliberately destructive to ourselves or others)
The saddest thing of all, I think, is when the ship isn't even at sail - and there is no journey to anywhere. The ship might simply be running around in circles in the harbor for years. Theme and goals have never even been properly identifed and acted upon. This is probably the hardest thing for me to deal with lately. In hindsight (again, in hindsight) it casts a very unfavorable light upon the "therapeutic" relationship that I was in for years, and my (seemingly logical) reliance upon that relationship as a source of guidance.
Of course, it's inevitable that I will have to identify better ways of rationalizing these past years - seeing how they were worthwhile and remembering the many positive experiences I've had. I will eventually place this all into a context and perpective that I can be at peace with. |
| catspine |
Posted - 03/07/2010 : 05:07:47
Mcone
Your post was really interesting, Thank you.
After reading it made me think of the gold rush:
If gold there was by the time you get there if you're lucky enough more often than not it's already gone anyway! and you end up with a big disappointment as a reward for a huge investment of yourself into an enormous efforts that was fruitless. I can understand your frustration.
Goals breed expectations and expectations often breed disappointment when they can not be reached.
I must agree with you I'd rather live for the journey instead, it's way more fun.
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| mcone |
Posted - 03/07/2010 : 01:38:24
Reflecting on this topic further, I personally feel that most of the established mental health institutions (i.e., the conventional psychiatric and psychological services) simply aggravate our problems.
So many of us seem to have experienced great frustration and dissapointment - angst coming from the very institutions that promote themselves as capable and trustworthy (tacitly and implicitly, if not expressly) of managing our psychological pain and problems constructively.
And so many of us have invested our trust in these institutions only to receive "treatment" that is protracted, costly and ineffective. Some might say, that at best, these relationships amount to nothing more than a wasteful diversion of potentially useful energy - energy and hope that might easily be invested in more worthwhile directions.
And my present view is that at worst, simply being a participant in a treatment relationship can be hazardous. One can easily be lulled into a false and misguided sense of security, a delusional sense that the "treatment" can be relied upon as a resource for developing self-knowlege, as a means for one's identification of life goals, and as a source of support for one to overcome obstacles while navigating towards acheivement of those goals.
In recent months (or years) I have increasingly felt like my very-long term treatment relationship accomplished these things poorly. And if I'm true to how I feel right now - and to the evidence and milestones of the past decade that seem to weigh most heavily in this equation, my feeling is that therapy accomplished none of those identified objectives. And this is in spite of being in a treatment relationship with an individual that I regard as the brightest and most dedicated mental health professional I've ever worked with.
This is paradox I can't easily come to terms with, other than to arrive at some combination of the following:
(1) "Conventional" psychotherapy is not effective; and/or
(2) My "issues" are too difficult to be resolved or improved significantly by conventional psychotherapy; and/or
(3) I might benefited in some ways, but I cannot recognize or appreciate this as I have been overwhelmed by an anxiety/depression/TMS disorder for that past three years that has profoundly affected the quality of my life and health. This disorder emerged while I was in treatment, and arguably, effective psychological treatment should mitigate against such a disorder.
As a final note, I've highlighted those items about identifying life concepts and overcoming barriers to acheiving them for a reason. When I relocated seven months ago, the treatment relationship I'm referring to was terminated. And yet, in recent months, growth and movement towards my "life concept" is advancing at an exponential rate in every way (professional, social, etc.). I am rapidly acquiring knowledge, skills and confidence in areas of life that had eluded me for years. And I have no therapy whatsover, other than my own reading, journaling and contemplation with friends.
(Note. I'm not counting the weekly visits to the psychiatrist, of course, mentioned elsewhere, as "therapy". This is an arrangement that I've intentionally engineered into a travesty - by expressly lying to him - and significantly, I'm beginning to realize that part of my motivation for doing so is to guard entirely, against the formation of any type of trust or reliance, that I fear would work to my detriment. I know this is not a sustainable situation; I just don't know how much longer it will last - as I may (but hopefully will not ever) need this provider for "administrative" reasons.)
In hindsight and in contrast, I was in therapy for nearly a decade without any substantial advancement in the most profoundly important areas of my life. It is obvious and evident - especially as I look back and re-read my original posts from late 2007 and 2008 that HUGE sections of the forrest of my life remained uncultivated and not addressed in any significant or effective way over many years of therapy. (These include the ability to form intimate relationships, dating, establishing roots in a community, dealing with all the emotional dimensions of marriage and family, etc.)
The other evidence (for my dissapointment with therapy) comes from simply looking at the two major positive life changes I made this past decade. Each were made under desperate, forced circumstances, and neither was done in any proactive, planned or graceful way.
These are specifically, my career change in late 2003, and my relocation in the fall of 2009. In the former case, I had remained unhappy in a marginal job for years, but I remained complacent until a departmental change made the job untennable. In the latter case, it took a TMS breakdown, and two to three years of extreme volatility, including over two years of unemployment, disabilty and tens of thousands of dollars of fruitless medical treatment, until I finally left Minnesota in desperation.
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| jerica |
Posted - 03/05/2010 : 17:12:34
The male therapist with the money thing is pretty good, honestly. He just costs too much and seem to focus on money a lot. Other than that he's actually really very good, has lots of techniques, is very pleasant to talk to, listens well, does not judge etc.
The female therapist I saw was a lot less money but would talk about TV shows, Dr "Oz", nutrition, making food, shopping, other clients and their situations, paranormal stuff as being possible causes for my problems, she was kinda judgey (you don't need to fall off your chair when I say I have high cholesterol, honestly).
So I mean yeah, I understand the boundaries and stuff with the male therapist I just kinda wish he would build in a couple of calls a month or something into the overall fee. I'm not looking for a 30 min session on the phone, just 5 mins of his time maybe once a week or even less. Just to get through those really bad moments.
I am not going back to the female therapist. It was just too upsetting to see her last time and I don't need that. |
| winnieboo |
Posted - 03/05/2010 : 12:52:41
quote:
you can call but if the conversation goes on for more than a few minutes I will have to charge you.
In the therapist's defense, this is a good way of setting boundaries. It maintains a sense of professionalism in the relationship and should also encourage you to contain or "journal out" some of your feelings between sessions.
However, you have told us so many other negatives about this therapist. The fence posts she set up regarding phone interaction I would think are fairly standard, but all of her personal chatter you reported from your previous sessions isn't. |
| jerica |
Posted - 03/05/2010 : 12:13:56
quote:
Originally posted by winnieboo
It's not easy to find the right therapist, but when you're in crisis mode, it can be a godsend.
I had a wonderful therapist in NY, I don't know if he is a TMS guy or not because I worked with him from when I was 17 to about age 27 then I moved to Texas. I would have stayed with him still if I'd stayed in NY. I even called him from here a few times and he did a phone session or two with me and had me write letters about what I was feeling and mail them to him. He was able to address the part of me that was always in crisis (he let me call him anytime up to 10:30 at night if I needed to and if he was away he'd call me back or he'd have his secretary call back with a message from him and she'd talk me down.) He didn't charge "extra" for that. He was reasonable and wonderful and he also understood my issues.
Now the guy here who wants 185 an hour (which is actually more than I've ever seen for a psychotherapist who isn't like a psychiatrist and all) doesn't really click with me 100% but he does push the "it's ANXIETY" focus which I really need, and he gave me a relaxation CD and gives me tools like doing something good for your personal care every day, putting stickies up to remind yourself of affirmations etc.
But I don't think he's had someone quite as bad as me before. I even asked him and he did say I was more severe than folks he usually saw. Also when I asked about being able to call him when needed (and I don't mean 20 times a day just to ask if I'll live) and he was like, you can call but if the conversation goes on for more than a few minutes I will have to charge you. In that I felt that his focus was more MONEY than on helping me. I'm already paying what I think is a very high amount for a 50 minute session, and reminding me about the money just changes the focus from a health care provider to being just about making cash. Not every therapist wants to be available by phone outside of the office visits but I need someone who can be and who isn't going to start a meter when I talk for more than a minute. I talk rapidly already which is why I barely breathe most of the time. I'm trying to get my words in as fastaspossible!
I must say I probably called my therapist in NY during those ten years probably hundreds of times and he never once mentioned money or asked me for more. He worked with me and when I needed it he gave me a kick in the butt. I wish I could see him again.
I have never found a therapist like him. I think now I am more attuned to male therapists because of that but out of the 5 I've had in the past few years all but one were female. But I have not felt comfortable with them, either.
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| yogaluz |
Posted - 03/05/2010 : 07:37:00
Jerica,
I can totally relate. I started seeing a therapist and over time, deeply buried issues about my mother surfaced and as we worked further and deeper, I started viewing my therapist as yet another mother figure that I couldn't express myself to. I was worried about what she thought of me and wanted to please her, just as I did my mother. My therapist was wonderful - not her fault at all. She simply didn't know what was going on in my mind and I, after working with her for a couple of years, left therapy.
I then moved to another town and started having a relapse of anxiety and other symptoms so I decided to try therapy again. Perhaps I should have chosen a man.... but I entered into a therapeutic relationship with another woman who, again, I can honestly say was a skilled and caring therapist. But within 6 weeks I was back to telling her how much I was improving and all the things I was supposedly doing to work towards feeling better. Yep, pasted that smile on my face and danced my little dance. I went home after my last session with her and said: "screw it, I'm not cut out for this therapy crap," and I haven't been back.
That being said, I believe that my first therapist was immensely helpful in the beginning when I was in full crisis mode and simply unable to play the good daughter with her. Once I was on the road to recovery, all my goodist tendencies took over. So perhaps therapists are valuable at certain times in our lives and to attain a level of stability? I think it would be amazingly empowering for you to hand your therapist your 'thoughts' list from above and ask him/her to respond. You wouldn't be the first person who felt this way about their therapist and if the person you're seeing is a professional, they'll show it in the way they respond. Sadly, I never had the guts as, particularly in the case of my first therapist, I was so emotionally entwined with her, I couldn't bring myself to have any kind of confrontation. Lame, and even writing this I'm thinking how differently I would do things now that I have some distance.
Don't be hard on yourself - I think what you're going through may be quite common and certainly, if your therapist is quoting Oprah and talking about their own lives, you should move on. |
| winnieboo |
Posted - 03/04/2010 : 20:34:16
Jerica,
I keep reading the responses here and I just want to add, yes, therapy is complicated. I just left a really skilled therapist six months ago, and I'm still processing everything that happened in the sessions and in our relationship.
In a nutshell, therapists are humans who come to the table with their own personalities, but truly, they should not bring their lives into the therapeutic relationship. AT ALL. I've worked with a therapist who was friendly with me and and I loved her, but she didn't help me progress. The last therapist was a complete professional, worked with Sarno, knew all about TMS, would barely allow me to mention a symptom and kept me focused on repressed emotions. It was painful and I grew to hate her. Now, as I process what happened, I see that I hated her because she represented my parents, only in a way, she was a much better parent than the ones I had. She had me pegged, she wouldn't let me deny or dodge feelings or my truth, but in the process, I couldn't help but read her as condescending and superior. My husband and I started calling her Dr. Evil. I'd come home SO ANGRY and she would tell me "it's transference." I'd think, NO, I just don't LIKE you. But six months later I can agree that it was transference. This lady did her job.
I left her and took on a new set of frightening symptoms and this Forum brought me back to my senses (thanks everybody!). I try not to put up too many questions and I usually feel embarrassed after I post in desperation, but there has been much wisdom here that's sent me back to the root of what caused as Skiz aptly called it, a or "my" breakdown three years ago. The root for me was mistreatment as a kid, to keep it simple. That mistreatment as a kid sent me into adult with a pretty lame set of tools to get along as a young women, a business person, you name the label, I had stuff to catch up on.
I am just now, as of about yesterday, understanding that the crux of being "cured" lies in forgiving yourself for not being perfect, not being smart enough, successful enough, whatever goes with your set of own unattainable goals that are beyond most human beings.
Getting to this point is beyond painstaking, mostly because we have to move past a giant mountain of our own stubborn denial. Get past that and then you have to face that the real trouble isn't something you can cut out with surgery or fix with a pill, it's more like a boiling pot down deep, or a gaping hole in the side of your soul. How do you get at that nebulous "thing"?
You get there, but it's an individual journey of course, and you have to be committed. Not just committed to believe it's TMS, but you have to commit to never to give up, and to be patient and to STOP going to the internet and the doctor and the radiology department. It's not easy to find the right therapist, but when you're in crisis mode, it can be a godsend. Spend the money. It's your life. People make fun of me for going to Whole Foods because of the expense and I say, "it's my food, I'm spending the money." Find a way to get the appointment; negotiate, many shrinks are compassionate and want to help and will do that.
Just make sure the therapist is wrapped up in your cause. It should never feel like a social engagement.
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| yogaluz |
Posted - 03/04/2010 : 19:30:24
Jerica,
I can totally relate. I started seeing a therapist and over time, deeply buried issues about my mother surfaced and as we worked further and deeper, I started viewing my therapist as yet another mother figure that I couldn't express myself to. I was worried about what she thought of me and wanted to please her, just as I did my mother. My therapist was wonderful - not her fault at all. She simply didn't know what was going on in my mind and I, after working with her for a couple of years, left therapy.
I then moved to another town and started having a relapse of anxiety and other symptoms so I decided to try therapy again. Perhaps I should have chosen a man.... but I entered into a therapeutic relationship with another woman who, again, I can honestly say was a skilled and caring therapist. But within 6 weeks I was back to telling her how much I was improving and all the things I was supposedly doing to work towards feeling better. Yep, pasted that smile on my face and danced my little dance. I went home after my last session with her and said: "screw it, I'm not cut out for this therapy crap," and I haven't been back.
That being said, I believe that my first therapist was immensely helpful in the beginning when I was in full crisis mode and simply unable to play the good daughter with her. Once I was on the road to recovery, all my goodist tendencies took over. So perhaps therapists are valuable at certain times in our lives and to attain a level of stability? I think it would be amazingly empowering for you to hand your therapist your 'thoughts' list from above and ask him/her to respond. You wouldn't be the first person who felt this way about their therapist and if the person you're seeing is a professional, they'll show it in the way they respond. Sadly, I never had the guts as, particularly in the case of my first therapist, I was so emotionally entwined with her, I couldn't bring myself to have any kind of confrontation. Lame, and even writing this I'm thinking how differently I would do things now that I have some distance.
Don't be hard on yourself - I think what you're going through may be quite common and certainly, if your therapist is quoting Oprah and talking about their own lives, you should move on. |
| catspine |
Posted - 03/04/2010 : 17:31:32
I'll repeat it : If you have a specific psychological problem and the cause has been identified and there is a known well referenced method for fixing the problem but the therapy doesn't work then it can only means two things : You need more time or the therapist is not good enough. |
| skizzik |
Posted - 03/04/2010 : 15:35:32
Jerica,
Your posts remind me alot about Jena who posts here off and on. Maybe look up her stuff and perhaps you'll relate, and that might be helpful.
She was a patient of Sarno with back pain that subsided, only to come back as horrible anxiety that made her feel like her heart would explode. |
| mcone |
Posted - 03/04/2010 : 15:21:36
I feel exactly the same way about my current shrink - and I've felt that way about most (but not all) shrinks that I've seen over the years. It has been literally enraging for me to be in his presence - a condescending attitude, and an air of smugness that is accompanied by poor insight, and a demonstrated lack of initiative to expand his knowledge or therapuetic technique.
This dis-inclination and inability to navigate any kind of complexity, in part, is what emboldened me to actually start fabricating blatant lies about my condition. I've never done anything like this in my life (and don't plan on making a habit of it), but in this situation it was like taking candy from a baby - candy that the baby shouldn't have.
Everyone is indeed unique, with different personalities, frames of reference, life experience, values, etc. For some people, it may be difficult to find a compatible therapist - I think the likelihood of mylsef finding one that at random is probably about 1 in 5 or 1 in 10. I also think that for some of us, the once a week, office visit format is of limited valued and that journaling or other resources are much more valuable.
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| catspine |
Posted - 03/04/2010 : 14:56:25
Jerica
Of course you speak freely with your therapist or else what's the point to go there in the first place?
Now, how did you select your therapist?
You have to feel comfortable with your him/her, this is very important when you choose the one you'll share your feelings and thoughts with.
Also just as important you must be true to yourself in every way during a session or how are you going to get a real answer based on pretense.
The purpose to go to an analytical therapist is to discover who you are and resolve the issues you have with that to find some balance and peace within your self.
If you're really accommodating so be it but if you're furious then be it as well. We are all made of opposites and everything in between some things we like some we don't but at least this is a chance to learn how to live with it .
I don't know how many times you went to your different therapists but let's say you paid a $100 each time and got nowhere, 10 times is a $1000 right?
How many $185 consultation can you get for that amount?
Even if you get 5 hours with a guy that can help you you're still better off than with 10 hours with the ones you dislike...not to mention that you'll have an extra 5 hours left to work and make the extra money you need but are you ready for it all?
I don't know if you realize that all the thoughts that you listed you're having during a session end up becoming a repressed emotion because you can not express them while you're there which is where it should be expressed. Dumping the load on your husband is not recommended either: he is your husband not your therapist.
Even if you're sad or upset or if you disagree with any one there is enough words in the vocabulary to get your point across precisely without nasty side effects you may fear. You may have to think a little more about what you're going to say and how but you definitely can be nice to get your point across...just take your time and choose your words. |
| winnieboo |
Posted - 03/04/2010 : 14:26:01
quote:
Anyway, how to YOU talk to your therapist if you have one? Do you ever get in arguments with them?
Yes, you should feel safe getting in arguments with them and more importantly, THEY should feel comfortable dealing with your anger.
Sounds like you already know that you need to fire this therapist, Jerica. The subject of every therapy session should be YOU. The therapist's husband/vaca/other patients/opinions about Oprah and the paranormal coming in to YOUR sessions is completely unprofessional and damaging to you, not to mention a waste of your time and money. Please find someone new and journal your heart out in the meantime.
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