| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 06/30/2012 : 11:18:18
Hi, My name is Wavy and I'm NOT an alcoholic, but they say in AA that "the disease" is cunning, baffling and powerful and I am feeling that way about my alleged TMS.
My current symptoms are extreme fatigue (keeling over after lunch for several hours) and dry eyes. Both of these (as I have found out after getting them) are common in my situation of having had uterine cancer, a hysterectomy, and so on last year. BUT I'm pretty sure that, while I may need to relax a lot and rest more than usual, there is much TMS going on here.
The dry eyes are crazy. I have done everything that one does including the dry eye doc, who nocebo-istically announced that they would never be cured, then proceeded to do a couple of procedures which he said might alleviate them. They didn't. It happens mostly at night. I wake up and the eyes are so dry and almost impossible to open and so painful that I have to jump up and wash them out. Bad for my sleep and bad for my peace of mind. And worse than anything, bad for my beautiful looks - I look puffy and tired.
Since it's something that I wake up with, it seems as though my unconscious is throwing a hissy fit in the night. It's so upsetting and physically almost an emergency (hard to live without being able to see) that I am having a great challenge applying any useful principles. The best I am managing right now is not taking it too seriously, and kind of waking up to the fact that it's TMS.
Is it? I hate to say it, but I'm not convinced.
TMSaholic in Tiburon
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
| 20 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| LuvtoSew |
Posted - 07/11/2012 : 17:26:36
Wavy,
I came down with dry eyes several years ago, had the paper test done , got put on tera tears eye drops, after several weeks were gone and never came back , so I do not believe its a life long condition. My husband also got glaucoma, got put on two eye drops , before his every 4 months eye appoints he uses them for two days and his pressure are fine. I told him tell the dr. and he said no. so hang in there, try the tera tears for a couple weeks. |
| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 21:08:19
what was this thread about?
love and peace between all! Yay!
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
| art |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 10:08:15
quote:
Originally posted by balto
quote:
Originally posted by art
...."And I hope he doesn't remember this too long."
Remember what?
My insensitive post.
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No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience.
Balto, I was trying to say in my clumsy way that it's already forgotten.. |
| balto |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 09:59:13
quote:
Originally posted by art
...."And I hope he doesn't remember this too long."
Remember what?
My insensitive post.
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No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience. |
| art |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 09:56:34
...."And I hope he doesn't remember this too long."
Remember what? |
| balto |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 09:52:14
It is just differences in thinking and expressing between 2 people. It could happen anywhere there are more than 2 people. It could happen between siblings, husband & wife, parents and kids,... It could happen anywhere. Let close this here. Art is someone I respect on this forum and I hope he doesn't remember this too long. I just have to be more careful with what I said here, my way of thinking is not always right or correct. Live and learn, I do appreciate Art for saying it out so I can learn how not to offend people unintentionally.
Sorry I offended you too Erata. You seem to pay more attention at my negative posts than my positive one.
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No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience. |
| art |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 09:44:03
quote:
Originally posted by Erata
Art, your reaction was spot-on, articulated beautifully and with restraint. Where to begin, indeed.
Pa-leezz Balto. Really.
Thank-you Erata. It helps tremendously to be validated like that. I can't tell you how much I appreciate it.
TT, No use trying to explain. You either respond the way Erata and I did, or you don't. I celebrate your right to disagree. And one has to respect your opinion on this, even though I disagree, given your age.
Balto, I know you mean well. NO hard feelings. |
| Erata |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 09:13:51
Art, your reaction was spot-on, articulated beautifully and with restraint. Where to begin, indeed.
Pa-leezz Balto. Really. |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 08:13:25
Hi Art, I'm not seeing it either, Balto is one of the sweetest, helpful and compassionate guys on the board. What is it specifically you are taking offense to? |
| balto |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 08:05:35
quote:
Originally posted by art
Occasionally you put up somewhat insensitive posts Balto. I don't even know where to begin. Really Balto, think it over. YOu have no idea what's going on in my life. I find your "inspirational" examples of "successful aging" deeply patronizing.
Edit: just to add, I also take issue with your characterization that I'm "pessimistic."
Oh my goodness Art! I'm so sorry the post offended you. I'm truly didn't mean it to be that way, my intention was nothing more than trying to cheer you up. I guess I failed miserably. Sorry Art. I just thought your post above was so sad and down, I just want to inspire you with some examples I really like.
I really think it over but I'm not really sure why my post appear insensitive. Maybe it is the culture thing, maybe it's that I'm not very bright. I guess I should not get personal with any thing I post just in case. I'm not good at comforting people.
But again, offended you or anyone else is the last thing on my mind. Sorry Art, hope you don't think much about this post.
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No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience. |
| art |
Posted - 07/08/2012 : 06:51:41
Occasionally you put up somewhat insensitive posts Balto. I don't even know where to begin. Really Balto, think it over. YOu have no idea what's going on in my life. I find your "inspirational" examples of "successful aging" deeply patronizing.
Edit: just to add, I also take issue with your characterization that I'm "pessimistic." |
| balto |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 11:37:39
quote:
Originally posted by art
Well to tell you the truth I haven't met a stage OF life yet that I haven't had difficulty with. I swear to God I remember sitting on the curb outside my house on my 5th birthday, worried about how I was going to handle being so much older.
No surprise that 60's have hit me hard. It's a difficult age. Friends start battling life threatening illnesses, and you have to wonder when it's your turn. Nora Ephron wrote:
"But the honest truth is that it’s sad to be over 60.
The long shadows are everywhere — friends dying and battling illness.
A miasma of melancholy hangs there, forcing you to deal with the fact that your life, however happy and successful, has been full of disappointments and mistakes, little ones and big ones.
There are dreams that are never quite going to come true, ambitions that will never quite be realised.
There are, in short, regrets."
I have read many of your post, I didn't realize your thought are so pessimistic. That is very conducive to tms/anxiety Art.
Where I came from, when one past the age of 60, they earn the right to be the "wise man" of the village. People would come to you for advice, encouragement, consultation on every issue in life... You would be the one with all the answers to any question people have. And if you don't have an answer, you would know exactly how to encourage the questioner how to find the answer or how to overcome whatever challenges they are facing. We need you to be positive and full of hope and full of life Art! :)))
Harry Bernstein
By the time he was 24 he had published a short story in a magazine.That was in 1934. He would then face the rejection of more than 40 novels over seven decades before he achieved literary success again. At the age of 96, Harry Bernstein published his memoir "The Invisible Wall".He wrote the manuscript for the "Invisible wall" when he was 93 as a way to deal with his memories and the loneliness he felt after his wife of almost seven decades,Ruby passed away from leukemia in 2002.
Nola(Hill) Ochs
On May 14,2007 became a Guinness World Record holder as the world's oldest college graduate.The 95-year old graduated from Fort Hays State University in Kansas 77 years after she first started taking classes.She earned a general studies degree with an emphasis in history,graduating alongside her grand daughter who was 21 years old at the time.
Grandma Moses
When people declare "you're never too old to try something new," it's because they're reminded of Grandma Moses, also known as Anna Mary Robertson. She took up painting at the age of 77 to help make ends meet during the depression. By the time of her death at age 101 she had completed over 1600 paintings.
George Burns (Nathan Birnbaum)
Actor,comedian,writer. His career spanned almost the entire 20th century. At the dawn of recordings, movies and television,he was one of the pioneers who helped invent modern show business.
Jeanne Calment
When Jeanne Calment died in 1997, she was 122 years old, and, according to the Guinness Book of World Records, the oldest person on earth. In Jeanne's long life, she crossed paths with a few eccentric personalities, including Vincent Van Gogh, and attended Victor Hugo's funeral at the age of 10. Age didn't hold her back when she took up fencing at age 85 and still rode a bicycle at age 100. She even dabbled in acting, appearing in the film Vincent and Me at age 114.
Irving Berlin
Another centenarian artist was composer Irving Berlin. Berlin was born in Belarus in 1888 and immigrated to the US with his parents in 1893. When working at a cafe as a young boy, the owner paid him 37 cents to compose a song. The rest is history. Berlin went on to compose over 3,000 songs including "God Bless America," "Anything You Can Do," and "There's No Business Like Show Business." He also composed 17 film scores and 21 Broadway scores before he passed away in 1989 at age 101.
Bob and Dolores Hope
Like Berlin, Bob Hope was extremely prolific when it came to entertainment, and in an industry where extreme longevity is rare for one spouse, it becomes all the more notable when both partners become famous centenarians. Bob Hope began his career on the vaudeville circuit in the 20s, entering singing and dancing competitions and doing Charlie Chaplin impersonations. He particularly embraced the U.S. Military, performing for soldiers during four different wars earning him an Honorary Veteran distinction by President Clinton in 1997.
Bob met his future wife Dolores in 1933 when she was working as a singer at the Vogue Club in Manhattan. Mrs. Hope performed occasionally on her husband's television specials and sometimes went along to perform for US troops, however, the bulk of her attention went to the couples four children and charitable work to benefit the poor. In 1993, well into her 80s, Dolores Hope ramped up her singing career, recording several albums over the following 10 years.
Bob Hope died in July 2003 at age 100. Dolores followed in September 2011, at 102.
just some examples of successful aging. I don't know how I would be like when I get there, but I thought I should start learning from these people and prepare for that day. They seem to enjoy their life till the last moment.
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No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience. |
| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 07/05/2012 : 07:30:10
Hi Art and all,
I'm also 61, and I spent last evening with a beloved friend who has a brain tumor. He is in a kind of blissful state almost as though he has entered a lightbody instead of dying. Or he may die. He says it all feels equal to him except for his partner, whom he loves being with. Of course, she is not so detached, but very much in acceptance.
And my sister just died and I have been at many bedsides as people die because of what I do. So I can relate to what you're saying. And I also feel something different:
Despite my current kicking and screaming, and all the stuff I am going through, and have gone through in the last decade (very high scoring stress test stuff) I feel as though I'm moving into a completely new life. In some ways the very fact of my age has allowed me to let go of certain compulsive drives to do, be, have for the wrong reasons. I sense a renaissance coming. I don't believe I will always suffer from TMS, but that I'm in the gradual process of a breakthrough into a new experience.
I'm not denying my shadow - hell, I'm right in the middle of it. But I don't see it as an inevitable ongoing state, but as a dark night of the soul from which a dawn light is emerging.
Last night we watched the San Francisco fireworks from my balcony!!
Love, Ms.Pollyanna xxx
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
| art |
Posted - 07/05/2012 : 06:12:41
quote:
Originally posted by mala
quote:
I'm so old and ugly now it doesn't matter any more. Which is freeing, if depressing.
Art, love yr posts but you do talk about being old. I've read it in yr other posts too. If I remember correctly you are about 61. That's not really old by today's standards. In fact a lot of our friends are that age if not older & don't act, feel or think that way.
Just interested to know why you make that reference so often. Does it bother you a lot?
Good Luck & Good Health
Mala
Hey Mala,
Well to tell you the truth I haven't met a stage OF life yet that I haven't had difficulty with. I swear to God I remember sitting on the curb outside my house on my 5th birthday, worried about how I was going to handle being so much older.
No surprise that 60's have hit me hard. It's a difficult age. Friends start battling life threatening illnesses, and you have to wonder when it's your turn. Nora Ephron wrote:
"But the honest truth is that it’s sad to be over 60.
The long shadows are everywhere — friends dying and battling illness.
A miasma of melancholy hangs there, forcing you to deal with the fact that your life, however happy and successful, has been full of disappointments and mistakes, little ones and big ones.
There are dreams that are never quite going to come true, ambitions that will never quite be realised.
There are, in short, regrets."
|
| mala |
Posted - 07/04/2012 : 21:35:04
So right about it being cunning, baffling & powerful.
My back pain, neck & shoulder pain has eased off slightly & my tummy is not so bad since I have stopped eating wheat.
Then I met a friend yesterday who hasn't been feeling well. She has been having mysterious aches & pains in her arms, shoulders, legs for the last 6 weeks or so. Her blood tests have come back normal. The doctor says it could be that she had a virus which hasn't completely left but its mostly guesswork.
She tell me that she has difficulty bending one of her knees to put on her trousers. I'm thinking OK at least I can do that.
Guess what happens next? This morning I wake up & my right knee is sore. The thing is now I KNOW FOR SURE this is TMS. I didn't do anything at all which would have caused it to hurt .
Its creepy how the mind can do this. So anyway I put on my 4 inch high heels & walked about the house this morning in defiance . Will let you all know how that goes.
Good Luck & Good Health
Mala |
| mala |
Posted - 07/04/2012 : 20:55:05
quote:
I'm so old and ugly now it doesn't matter any more. Which is freeing, if depressing.
Art, love yr posts but you do talk about being old. I've read it in yr other posts too. If I remember correctly you are about 61. That's not really old by today's standards. In fact a lot of our friends are that age if not older & don't act, feel or think that way.
Just interested to know why you make that reference so often. Does it bother you a lot?
Good Luck & Good Health
Mala |
| balto |
Posted - 07/04/2012 : 19:43:13
quote:
Originally posted by fadoozle
SteveO, what are your thoughts with regard to pediatric cancer (e.g. an 18-month-old with a brain tumor)?
Also, there are three different types of tears (basal, reflex, and emotional). I have dry eyes and still can cry emotional tears.
My point here I guess is that our bodies do change over time, and that I wonder if we can trace the mind/body connection to *all* illness. If that were true, would Dale Carnegie have died of cancer at 61? Would Wayne Dyer have leukemia?
I think babies can feel lots of stress too. Their brains are not fully developed but there are types of stress their bodies can feel. Stress from hunger, too hot or too cold, lack of bonding, lack of touching, too bright, too much noise, not enough sleep, insect bite,...
Dale Carnegie and Dr Wayne Dyer are human just like us. We all have desires, wish, craving,... we all want this and that. We all have stress. Until we leave this earth, we will all subject to stress. Also, they maybe great teacher, great writer, communicators, but they forgot to practice what they preached. We're all human that sometimes are full of anger, greed, and hatred.
just my 2 cents.
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No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience. |
| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 07/04/2012 : 13:35:07
Art, that is so exactly right!
There is so much perfectionist conflict in my brain. I want to be one of the people who are "perfect, right and done" with TMS. I teach about this stuff, after all (while admitting of course that I'm in process).
I'm trying to bothand (new verb) the whole thing.
I bet you're not ugly. 
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
| PJ77 |
Posted - 07/04/2012 : 05:47:31
Hi art,
Good advice to make friends with it, it can only help to take the pressure off.
However it can get very very tough at times especially when one cannot stand up for longer than 5 mins! This TMS perhaps needs more work on it by therapists as everything they have recommended has certainly not worked with me - it is money down the drain and you wonder at times do they really know what they are talking about? |
| art |
Posted - 07/04/2012 : 05:21:32
I laughed because for a long time I'd literally have chosen looking well to feeling it. I'm so old and ugly now it doesn't matter any more. Which is freeing, if depressing.
Were it I, I'd assume a long recovery. I'm sure there are cancer forums in which they discuss this sort of thing. Assuming TMs involves a whole bunch of additional problems as in,
1: I just can't quite fully believe, or
2: I do fully believe and it's not going away, so how come? or
3: I'm journaling my ass off and it's not helping
etc. etc...
Advice is cheap, but since I'm a veteran of a long, chronic, mystery illness myself, perhaps you'll forgive the presumption: endeavor to the extent possible to give yourself permission to be sick. TRy to make friends with it. You have to find a way to take the pressure off yourself. I really truly suspect you'll be improving soon in any case. Perhaps quicker still
if you find ways to make peace... |
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