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 what's your favorite anger release method
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scottjmurray

266 Posts

Posted - 02/18/2009 :  20:25:41  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
i just wanted to get an idea of what you guys are doing to release your anger at home. i've tried a lot of stuff but my all time favorite (and the most effective) is as follows.

punch something. i don't know what it is about the jerky body motions but they allow me to feel the anger fully course through me. it works with sorrow too. it really gets it out. not an intellectual thought in the universe, just me wailing on something until the feeling leaves me.

this can also been done with hard breathing, like breathing out really hard until the uncomfortable feeling is gone. or just jerking your body, like punching your fists downward while standing up really works the same way. eventually, you hit hard enough and the feeling evaporates. no more discomfort.

needless to say, i've abandoned journaling or writing about my emotions. i deal with them as they come by in the most physical way possible. often i have no idea what it is im even punching, the voice of my mom or my 3rd grade teacher or whatever, but my brain feels still as a morning lake afterward, so i don't really care. it works.

what about you guys?

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Peg

USA
284 Posts

Posted - 02/19/2009 :  06:01:21  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks for the reminder Scott.

I've beaten an old leather chair with a whiffle bat in the past and it did feel good. As I said in another post, breaking up my old kitchen cabinets felt GREAT!

Unfortunately, lately, I've been trying to think it away (intellectualizing-bad I know). I guess that's why my traps still tighten up occasionally.

"but my brain feels still as a morning lake afterward"

Sounds good, I want some of that. This will be my homework.

Best,Peg

In questions of science, the authority of a thousand is not worth the humble reasoning of a single individual. Galileo Galilei
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hottm8oh

USA
141 Posts

Posted - 02/19/2009 :  08:47:03  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
My favorite release right now is exercise. I do Pilates with a group twice a week, and it's very meditative. It forces me to concentrate on the moment, and the physical exertion works out the hyper-ness that the anger gives me. I bike on my days off from Pilates.

I need to find a more portable form of anger release. I can't get on the floor and exercise while I'm in the office. Maybe I can keep a big pillow nearby for punching when my coworkers aggravate me.
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winnieboo

USA
269 Posts

Posted - 02/19/2009 :  10:18:37  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Exercise. Meditation and prayer. Reframing the way I think about problems and situations.
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celloLWF

USA
49 Posts

Posted - 02/19/2009 :  16:47:11  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
running, playing guitar, and sex.
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scottjmurray

266 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2009 :  01:45:30  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
sex.


word.

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scd1833

USA
124 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2009 :  00:08:56  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
i cut loose on the drums sometimes or scream
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marsha

252 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2009 :  08:52:03  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
The only thing I get angry about is my bad days. I have cried, yelled and screamed at my brain and thrown things around. Result..More bad days.
I have hundreds of pages of my journaling. My discovery is that what happened happened, it is part of who I am . I haven’t let it go I have just accepted it and I rarely go back there. Somewhere inside there is an angry child. I know why she exists and that is enough. For me it isn’t necessary anymore to continue to review the items that have contributed to my sadness, fear and rage.
I guess we all have our own way of dealing with TMS. It is after all a MINDBODY experience.
Marsha
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Stryder

686 Posts

Posted - 02/25/2009 :  19:57:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Scream, yell and curse like a sailor. Best done when driving with the windows rolled up. Take care, -Stryder
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AbSteidley

10 Posts

Posted - 02/26/2009 :  10:56:22  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Breathing, meditation, focusing on the physical sensation of the feeling of anger, and then a fabulous method of changing the whole source of the anger - Self Coaching 101. I don't think the anger is always from some past issue - sometimes it's just right here, right now. I highly recommend Self Coaching 101, which is available at the website of my fellow coach, Brooke Castillo. Google her and you'll find it.

Abigail
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RageSootheRatio

Canada
430 Posts

Posted - 02/26/2009 :  11:16:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
The Solution Method is working well for me. (Also known as Developmental Skills Training.) How to use it is explained in Laurel Mellin's books, The Pathway and The 3-day Solution Plan. I have found the process rather enlightening in that besides "releasing anger" it has helped to uncover some things I was "enraged" about that I didn't even realize.
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scottjmurray

266 Posts

Posted - 02/26/2009 :  15:43:44  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
it has helped to uncover some things I was "enraged" about that I didn't even realize.


like what?
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scottjmurray

266 Posts

Posted - 02/26/2009 :  15:48:17  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
to add something to this discussion what i'm usually angry at (and i think this might actually be the only thing) is what eckhart tolle would describe as "the mind." it's this little thing that resides in me and its sole responsibility is to try to make me do stuff that i don't really want to do. i've realized that as far as life goes, i can handle whatever's happening, it's the extra stuff that the mind wants me to do (which is basically assembling an identity separate from myself) that makes me so angry.

another word for it would be the ego. peculiar structure.

once i understand this more i might put it up on my site, which i've taken down for the time being.
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elsfive

14 Posts

Posted - 02/28/2009 :  12:09:06  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Questions for Scott -

I have read the information on the "Redirecting Self Therapy" website and buy into it completely. My issue is that I get tired after about 30 seconds of punching the bed - which I don't think is really long enough to get the benefit. How do you do it?

Also do you only release anger when feel something is going on that would indicate that you need too, i.e. obsessing or depression etc or have you tried and had any benefit from just taking some time every day to do it whether you notice symptoms that would indicate you need to release or not?

It seems you have had a lot of success with this method and I would like to know more specifics about how you are implementing it.
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scottjmurray

266 Posts

Posted - 03/01/2009 :  13:36:07  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
to elfs:

anger only comes out when it needs to. if you really feel like you need to punch a hole through something, that's when its time to release your anger. you can't just summon it out of thin air in an effort to get better, although if you push yourself really hard you will get angry simply because you're pushing yourself. but that isn't going to get you anywhere really.

if you're feeling really upset and screwed up do what comes naturally.
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scottjmurray

266 Posts

Posted - 03/02/2009 :  03:21:52  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
oh yeah, um, kind of hard to explain over the internet, but anything you express will need to eventually kind of shoot out of you like a beam of light. it needs to come out of you. i don't know how else to explain this. tension drops, your brain actually stops. it kind of feels like zooming back into reality. i don't really know if this is some kind of spiritual thing or not, but it sure feels like it. again, hard to explain. it actually does get rid of tms completely, though. no pain, no anxiety, no bouncy mind, no equivalents or symptom imperative, no agitation whatsoever. its pretty nice actually.

e-mail me if you're confused.
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head2toe

United Kingdom
37 Posts

Posted - 03/02/2009 :  04:49:00  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I tried Redirecting for a long time and hurt my hands! I read Cure by Crying and did loads of crying, prompted by watching sad videos etc. I did Osho's Dynamic Meditation for 21 days straight. This is a mixture of chaotic breathing through the nose (10 mins), catharsis in whichever way you choose eg pillow bashing, screaming, crying (10 mins) jumping up and down and much more - total time 1 hour! It was really hard going but I completed it. Not much change in symptoms really but who knows.

I am currently reading The Emotion Code by Dr Bradley Nelson and Remarkable Healings by Dr Modi. Both fascinating books. The first one is about trapped emotions and how to release them and the other one is about a more unlikely source of pain and other symptoms - pretty mindblowing stuff really (if you look it up on Amazon, the reviews will tell you all you need to know!).

For those who have not responded to Dr Sarno's suggestions of journalling and therapy, this might be an avenue to explore. An open mind is definitely needed, though some people might find it a bit disturbing and others might think it's complete and utter nonsense. I always keep an open mind about things. I'm sure that as humans we know very little about many aspects of our vast universe and the things that can affect us!

If anyone wants more information on my personal experiences with the above, feel free to get in touch.
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scottjmurray

266 Posts

Posted - 03/02/2009 :  19:24:56  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
This is a mixture of chaotic breathing through the nose (10 mins), catharsis in whichever way you choose eg pillow bashing, screaming, crying (10 mins) jumping up and down and much more - total time 1 hour!


rofl, that sounds like a hell of a workout.

quote:
I'm sure that as humans we know very little about many aspects of our vast universe and the things that can affect us!


our bodies tell us all we need to know.
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winnieboo

USA
269 Posts

Posted - 03/03/2009 :  11:30:02  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
One word: Forgiveness. Of yourself and others. Often requires psychotherapy (copious amounts were required in my case). I just got to the bottom of some huge problems and blocks and I just don't feel angry anymore. It's like taking Prozac without taking the Prozac. I'm like, winnieboo "lite."

Edited by - winnieboo on 03/03/2009 11:32:28
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