| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| art |
Posted - 05/01/2007 : 14:11:03
I was about to add this to the bloated mess that started out as a well-intentioned thread on politics and rage, but it's probably better to start anew...
For those who are upset that the forum veterans would be of better use helping newcomers than spouting off about politics, I apologize.
TT is right when he says that all anyone needs to recover is one of the books, but at the same time, what's crystal clear to some of the old timers is far from a settled issue to someone struggling to get a handle on things...What the newcomer needs more than anything it seems to me, is simple reassurance.
That said, in the last analysis we all need to take responsibility for our own recovery. That's really an essential component of the TMS approach. Doctors don't make us well, forum veterans don't make us well, we make ourselves well. If a thread is of no interest, probably best to simply skip that particular thread, than waste time being annoyed by it..If a question goes unanswered for a time, a simple search will most often yield much helpful information...
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| 12 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 05/06/2007 : 09:42:31
No Worries Karen, nothing directed at you personally. I always take extra-care in my replies to you, now that I know you better.
I have witnessed a lot of growth by you. You have become more willing to accept that your symptoms are of TMS origin. If one sticks around the board long enough that can happen. If one cuts and runs, they're losing out on a golden oopportuity.
You have toughed it out, fought and struggled.
Best wishes to you and good luck with your pet.
tt
some of my favorite excerpts from 'TDM' : http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605
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| Singer_Artist |
Posted - 05/05/2007 : 21:15:12
Hi Tom,
I just wanted to clarify that I wasn't directing what I wrote at you...The part that resonated so much with me was the part where Shary mentioned us being a 'family' of sorts on this forum..And that less insults and more tolerance of differing viewpoints would be healthy..It is up to me if I chose to read any thread..
The threads that have naturally hurt me were the ones that were intended to hurt me..Like when a certain woman on here (Helen) wrote something very demeaning, nasty and uncalled for to me..Believe me, it was meant to hurt, it was blatantly obvious to many others on here..You and Art have gone at it for a long time, but you always seem to become civil again with each other, and respect one anothers intelligence..Of course as a goodist, I want us all to get along and be pals! But I also am mature enough to realize that that is nearly impossible on a public forum..
In any case, I want you to know that I have seen how much you have helped people on here and how little you have asked for help in return..You and I have gotten into it b4 with that out of control fight about global warming..Your sarcastic side did get to me (at the time), but now when i look back I realize that I chose to allow it to get to me..So I actually learned something from it..I just felt the need to say this because i am grateful to you for many times that you put alot of energy into helping me in the past..
Now let's all be nice nice again!  |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 05/05/2007 : 20:41:25
Let's not pussey-foot around. I'm sure much of this is directed at me. But I know that I am certainly NOT the only one who participates in heated "debate" that occassionly deteriortaes to flame and name-calling.
From my perspective, the make-up up this board is predominately "liberal." To me I define that as "anything goes", acceptance of "diverse" ideas as long as they are NOT traditonal Judeo/Christian. I think this is what is called social/realativism, in the "new-speak". I know there are a few who I would term traditionalists out there, and they e-mail me telling me they agree with my views but I assueme they also feel intimidated to speak their views.
I have purposely NOT expressd any of my political or social views for a long time. But when a thread was started on that topic and views were expressed that I differed with, I replyed. I expressed my views without any name-calling. My views being in the minority here, get me flamed. When I respond to that, the original name-caller is forgotten about and I am the goat. I am a life-long registered Democrat, my party abandoned me. In reality I am a political moderate.
I have said I am an anarchist, but that's because I am pragmatic. I have accepted the political line of least resistance in my SANCTUARY city. A city which is a sactuary for everyone on the planet accept Americans.
I reserve the right to reply in kind and meet the escalteing rhetoric in kind. Some people enjoy reading the flames and are not at all bothered by them. I have been an observer in the past and didn't get into a tizzy or get my panties into a bunch from reading the heated posts.
It's pretty obvious when a thread is degenerating into flames, so STOP reading. Butt out and let those who have the balls for it have their go. But some can't resist, read them and then have a holier-than now posture about them. They would never stoop to such demeaning behavior--"Why can't we all make nice-nice?" "Why can't we all be friends?" Their s--- doesn't stink.
Life is full of unpleasant moments. If you can't handle it here, what happens when you have to face it head-on?
I have by far the highest post-count because I've been around one of the longest. I have NO qualms that 98% of my posts have been positive, with reccommendations to TMS practitioners, encouragement and accurateTMS information.
As the Good Doctor, says most people will not accept TMS and if someone gets chased away by my views, they probably need their TMS. I don't start the hightened rhetoric, but if personally attacked, I am not going to sit around and turn the other cheek.
If I'm a lightening-rod for people's TMS then, take a vote and I'll be happy to abide by the majority. If you kick me off the board you'll be doing me a favor, I spend far too much time here helping others and I have NEVER asked for any help or support for myself. If you only accept TMS help from those you agree with politicaly then so be it.
My interest here has been to further my knowledge of TMS. I have accmplished that goal and am not getting anything personally out of it anymore. I have "cured" my TMS proselytizing "goodism" and am a well-man. Maybe with me gone, the legion I have chased away, will feel safe to return, not fearing my sarcasm.
So hold a plebecite, if you wish, you won't hurt my feelings, trust me.
Cheers,
tt
some of my favorite excerpts from 'TDM' : http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605
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| wrldtrv |
Posted - 05/05/2007 : 20:26:06
I can see both sides of the argument. I understand that some people are more sensitive than others. Some feel threatened by heated debate and prefer more diplomatic means of expression. Others feel that only stricly TMS ideas should be discussed here. Many of us (including me) rather enjoy the political battles. I can certainly empathize with all of these views to some extent.
I think there is something to the idea of exploring why
each of us is either threatened, energized, bored, or amused by what we read here. This could have a lot indeed to do with TMS.
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| weatherman |
Posted - 05/05/2007 : 16:03:16
I must say I found the recent flame party interesting, in that practically every political viewpoint was expressed - from left-wing to right-wing to liberal to libertarian and everything in between. In a way, it does help identify where people are coming from when offering advice about TMS or anything else for that matter. We all view the world through our own filter, based on upbringing, experience, geography etc. However, I have to say I've seen very good advice on TMS on this board from people I thoroughly disagree with politically. Aches and pains make for strange bedfellows, to corrupt a cliche.
Weatherman |
| Singer_Artist |
Posted - 05/05/2007 : 09:26:05
Shary,
I AGREE 1000 percent with every word you said! I couldn't agree more..This has felt like a family of sorts for me..especially since I have shared some very intimate details about my life and have become cyber friends with several wonderful people here..I have also been on the receiving end of some horrific insults to my very character in a thread or two in the past..name calling was thrown at me and all..I can tell you from direct experience..IT REALLY DID HURT..literally and figuratively..
On a positive note, I have gotten some wonderful insights and support from amazingly kind and intelligent people on this forum..
Hugs and God bless,
Karen |
| Shary |
Posted - 05/05/2007 : 09:08:09
Good point, Dave. This is supposed to be a TMS HELP forum for people struggling with a problem that, according to most doctors, doesn't even exist. When I read some of these posts, I think, Wow! Why all the anger? Why the need for so much sarcasm and hostility? And why the need to vent it HERE? Why not just put up a punching bag in the basement instead?
As for being strangers, well, we are and we aren't. True, we would never recognize each other on the street, should our paths ever cross. But that very anonymity is what lets us open up and allow others an intimate look into what goes on in our brains. In some ways we get to know each other better than our own family members know us--and we ARE a family of sorts, brought together by TMS. That being said, I think a little less insult-swapping and a little more tolerance for differing viewpoints would make for a better website. |
| Dave |
Posted - 05/04/2007 : 12:56:53
My standard response to these threads is to look within yourself before pressing the "Post" button. Try to find the reasons why you are personally offended by strangers posting a message in a forum. Try to find the repressed rage that is being disguised as conscious rage aimed at a person who you have never met. Examine the reasons why you cannot just accept that some people have differing opinions even if you feel they are absurd. Figure out why it is impossible for you to simply ignore these threads and go outside for a walk or play some tennis (pun intended).
We've lost quite a few members over the years due to "flame wars" taken too personally. Sometimes when something touches a nerve inside you, it can be a signal that there is some unconscious emotion that needs to be addressed, that is striving to come to the surface. It just might be an emotion that is causing TMS symptoms. |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 05/02/2007 : 23:41:10
quote:
Originally posted by shawnsmith
quote:
Originally posted by tennis tom
t also brings the members of the board closer together in team building
Nice spin Tom, but it has left a very bitter taste in my mouth. You have said things and made accusations about people on a public forum that is tantamount to slander.
*************
Sarno-ize it!
*************
Well look who's calling the kettle black. Actually, that's pretty funny SS, you slander the Prsident of the United States, our military, at least half the voting citizens and the entire state of Israel, and you cry slander. So sue me.
Try gargleing with Listerine, you put that bitter taste into our own mouth, not me; you'll get over it. After a couple of these flame wars you'll be an old hand at it and think nothing of it.
some of my favorite excerpts from 'TDM' : http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605
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| Newmom |
Posted - 05/02/2007 : 14:11:00
To the seniors of the board,
I feel the need to say the off-topic posts here are amusing. I have worked in a very political law firm for over 5 years now, and I have learned to listen to views (more experienced lawyers always think they are more knowledgeable, etc.) rather than give my two sense. The fact that nobody knows each other, makes these arguments and disagreements very interesting - maybe even helps with some internal rage also?!!. Keep up the good work. Maybe sometime soon I will get the courage to chime in!!
On another note, the posts regarding the TMS stuff is extremely helpful, and I am glad I found my way here. I do find it relaxing to go somewhere familiar and get caught in a distraction every now and then from what originally brought me here though, but on the days that the TMS gremlin is getting to me, I find comfort here as well.
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| shawnsmith |
Posted - 05/02/2007 : 10:37:03
quote:
Originally posted by tennis tom
t also brings the members of the board closer together in team building
Nice spin Tom, but it has left a very bitter taste in my mouth. You have said things and made accusations about people on a public forum that is tantamount to slander.
*************
Sarno-ize it!
************* |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 05/02/2007 : 09:07:28
Hear, hear! Well said Art, I agree with you whole-heartedly. I feel your "Politics and Rage" thread serves a useful purpose for an occasional catharsis from the rigors of TMS work.
It also brings the members of the board closer together in team building, having shared their world views. It's kind of like the veterans of wars from opposing sides gathering together years later, except in a more stream-lined fashion, better serving the "now" genration.
Conflict exists in the real world and is difficult to avoid. If we don't have some we will make-up some imaginary conflicts to serve the gremlin. TMS'ers being represserors and suppressors, aren't real good at dealing with conflict, therefore break-out in TMS symptoms. Your thread serves as a good work-shop for TMS'ers to practice their conflict skills. There's probably a Psych 101 class observing behind a one-way mirror.
If Dave decides to jetison the thread into some cyber-space black hole, it wouldn't hurt my feelings any. (I will be selling transcripts on e-bay for $100.00 each, 10% discount to TMS board members).
Regards,
tt
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