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stefan
56 Posts |
 Posted - 08/08/2008 : 08:58:53
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Recently Dr. Sarno said he has been encouraging his patients to befriend the little bugger :) I am curious how many have tried and the success rate.
Also how did you do it? What to avoid? Any suggestions appreciated.
Ars Longa Vita Brevis |
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golden_girl
United Kingdom
128 Posts |
Posted - 08/08/2008 : 09:37:11
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From what I know, or think, referring to it as 'the little bugger' is not the best idea!! 
"F.E.A.R.
Forgive Everyone And Remember
For Everything A Reason"
Ian Brown |
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armchairlinguist
USA
1397 Posts |
Posted - 08/08/2008 : 12:04:52
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I recommend searching on "inner child" on the board because there have been extensive past discussions; maybe also look for mentions of Bradshaw or Miller (inner child literature).
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What were you expecting? |
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skizzik
USA
783 Posts |
Posted - 08/08/2008 : 14:55:50
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| You can give your Inner Child ice cream cones to stop the pain like Fred Amir. |
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scottjmurray
266 Posts |
Posted - 08/09/2008 : 03:09:44
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i actually did make my pain stop one time by bribing my subconscious with reese's peanut butter cup ice cream. my favorite. that was a weird moment for me.
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i'm not s#!t.
i'm champagne. |
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mizlorinj
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - 08/10/2008 : 10:17:30
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| Speaking kindly to yourself, as if speaking to a child. Changing the harsh inner voice to a kind, loving and nurturing one. Takes time but works wonders. A lot of times what we repeat is things we've been told that aren't encouraging. So, thinking about some basic beliefs, spoken or implied, and countering them with upbuilding affirmations. |
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altherunner
Canada
511 Posts |
Posted - 08/10/2008 : 16:56:13
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One customer sometimes sends a nasty email or leaves a nasty comment on my voice mail if we messed up a delivery, and this really upset me. I was reading John Bradshaw and realized that this one client was
using shame and guilt on me, as my parents did. I don't think it will have the same effect on me anymore. He is older than me, maybe a looked at him as a parent figure. I think I would have been a better parent to my kids if I knew about his work. |
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stefan
56 Posts |
Posted - 08/11/2008 : 23:47:21
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Hey thanks you guys for all the replies. I guess I'm still trying to figure out the accuracy of things.
I remember John Stossel on the original 20/20 video saying he screams at his brain and it works for him. Another guy said: "Down Boy", etc. Maybe to some of you it is plain to decipher whether they're talking to the inner child or the psyche who watches the levee of rage ready to break and decides do distract you.
It would be nice to know the exact make up of our inner self. From what I understand, we have the Freudian explanation of id, ego, and the parent. But let me ask you, Is id the decider - our other self in the parallel universe of our hidden consciousness, who distracts us when it looks like the undesirable emotions are ready to surface? Is Id the one that Stossel is screaming at?
I think someone also said he/she screams at the pain. In either case it would make sense the child in us needs soothing/nurturing not being screamed at. After all it doesn't work in the conscious life either.
Ars Longa Vita Brevis |
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winnieboo
USA
269 Posts |
Posted - 08/16/2008 : 16:47:26
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I think it's a process.
Step one is recognizing that there's even a voice or a force or an id or an inner child within. And then I think the natural thing is to get mad at it. Who wouldn't be mad at it? After all, when you first discover it, it's usually because it's causing a lot of trouble! And then you slowly make your peace, which has got to be different for everybody. Some people read a Sarno book or Ekhart Tolle or whatever and settle in and move on. Other people like me need to deconstruct every little thing in psychotherapy.
But yeah, I think the end goal is to make friends or at least come to an understanding of that inner child and see what's causing the trouble and see the patterns that you get stuck in and then the work is to not engage with it. I've read so much about resistance, so I don't think the thing is to suppress it or repress or push it away--that caused me a heap of trouble in the first place--but more so, the trick is to know that it's there and it'll talk to you, but you don't really engage it anymore.
I don't think you just do it once, either, like some big a-ha, b/c I keep thinking I have an a-ha and everything's cool now, but then the "little bugger" rears it's ugly head again. I mean, it's a part of us and unfortunately I don't think it's going anywhere. So when it says hello again and you identify with it, you get into another another pain cycle or get another physical symptom. So I think it's a process that you have to do over and over. Patiently and compassionately as much as you can. |
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Befriending the inner child
