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positivevibes
204 Posts |
 Posted - 12/09/2008 : 11:38:24
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It's been a while since I've posted here. A lot has gone on. I wrote about an emotional problem I was having in my marriage a few months ago. Through therapy I had a major breakthrough and then had a bunch of conversations with my husband, so that problem has gotten much better. Of course, my back pain improved after all that was out in the open!
A few months ago, I found out that I had a benign tumor in my sinus. I won't go into all the details, but it turns out that I've had it for years, and it was the cause of many of my upper respiratory problems. I had endoscopic surgery in late October to remove the tumor.
A month before the endoscopic surgery, I'd had a second series of epidural cortisone shots in my lower back. The shots caused sciatic problems down my left leg, so I was resting a lot. And after the endoscopic sinus surgery, I was also resting a lot. So I got close to 2 months of semi-bedrest. When it was all finished, my back no longer hurt, my sinuses were healed, and thankfully the sciatic problem had disappeared.
One day a few weeks after my sinus surgery, I decided to do some vacuuming in the house. Afterward my back felt weird, like I'd pulled something. It made no sense, because the vacuuming was easy. That pulling feeling continued for weeks. Logically, there was no good reason to feel the discomfort weeks afterward. From a TMS perspective, I reasoned that I was somehow continuing to create the pain. True, I'd been very inactive for a long time. And I'd taken Prednisone after the sinus surgery, which had made me feel very weak for a while. But now I was better, so why was I still in pain? This pain was different than the back pain I'd experienced before. It wasn't actually pain, but extreme discomfort. Something just felt very tight.
I did some research and concluded that the Quadratus Lomborum muscle (and/or other muscles in that area of my left lower back) was tight. I also came across some information about Somatic Muscle Dysfunction. I thought about it -- yes, I seemed to be habitually tighening certain muscles (my glutes, and certain lower back muscles), which was making the pain occur, or making things worse.
So I did a little experiment based on what I'd read about Somatic theory and muscle re-training. I stood up against a wall, closed my eyes, and tried to feel all the tighteness in my back and glutes. Slowly I released the tightness in each place. It wasn't easy, but I was able to do it. With the muscles all relaxed, the position of my pelvis changed very slightly. Within a few minutes, the pain was gone.
Over the past few days, I've been very gentle with my body, consciously relaxing certain areas, using a lot of heat (from baths, our hot tub, and a heating pad), and taking a little bit of Ibuprofen. I've been going to the gym and I'm able to work out without much pain at all. When I'm doing my usual daily routines thoughout the day, if my back begins to feel tight, I take a moment to consciously relax the muscles. Then it feels better.
This "Somatic" stuff is very compatible with Dr. Sarno's theories about conditioning. Basically the Somatic people say that your brain is causing your pain. But not just because of emotional problems, but because you are habitually tensing certain muscles in reaction to the problems. They say that your brain and body get stuck in patterns of guarding or tensing, long after the real physical problem has ceased. This makes a lot of sense to me.
I think it's normal to tense yourself even more if you begin to feel pain, or if you begin to get upset about something. I'm trying to teach my body to relax more and have better posture. I'm hoping to re-train my brain and body to stop tensing certain areas and break the conditioning. So far, it's working.
I ordered a book from the library about Somatic Muscle Work. It has you doing certain types of movements and exercises to re-train your body to relax in certain positions. I haven't gotten the book yet, but I'll be curious to see if this is the final thing that helps me break my cycle of needless muscle tension, particulary in my glutes. |
Edited by - positivevibes on 12/09/2008 11:46:00 |
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Pd245
58 Posts |
Posted - 12/09/2008 : 15:14:51
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I experience the habitual muscle tightening in my neck, which causes headaches. I'm combining biofeedback with psychotherapy because I know that this habit of tensing comes from childhood and living in a dangerous environment. But, the tension is certainly caused by emotional issues and comes up when I'm feeling specific feelings (or repressing certain feelings). I think that dealing with emotional issues is of primary importance, and that learning how to generally relax those areas you habitually tense is also important. But I've found that focusing in on a certain area over and over again to relax it can backfire as you're giving it what it wants - attention. With Sarno, as you know, you're supposed to take your attention completely away from the painful area (it gets no attention), whereas with relaxation training and body awareness training your attention is on the painful area all day - staying vigilant to keep it from tensing. I found this to feed into the obsession. So, I didn't find Feldenkrais or the Alexander Technique to be particularly helpful.
One interesting thing - in biofeedback I learned that your brain can tell you that a certain area is tight, but in reality it's relaxed. The biofeedback equipment proves it over and overr again. Very strange.
Anyway, it's definitely worth investigating - I know other people who have healed their RSI issues through somatic re-education - but they also combined it with working on emotional issues. It was a big disappointment to me when it didn't solve my issues, but we're all different and maybe it's a part of the answer for you. It'll be interesting to see if it works for you!
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Edited by - Pd245 on 12/09/2008 15:18:08 |
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positivevibes
204 Posts |
Posted - 12/10/2008 : 23:39:59
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Well, I totally understand your point about Sarno saying that the pain should get no attention. But when your muscles feel tight, you feel like you want to "do something about it" because it makes you feel uncomfortable!
Lately I'm feeling much better about things in general, and can optimistically tell myself, "it's only muscle tension; nothing to be too worried about." After going through a crisis this summer where an epidural cortisone shot irritated my sciatic nerve (I was so scared that the problem might not go away -- it took an entire month to stop), "just a muscle problem" seems easy to deal with in comparison!
Anyway, I dunno. Seems to me that I have some sort of weird muscle memory thing going on. I want to give it some attention to see if I can break the patterns, if that is what is happening. This may go against Sarno's teaching to some extent, but the difference is, I'm not stopping my normal life. I'm forcing myself to move ahead and do all the things I feel like doing, such as going to the gym, doing chores, whatever I feel that I want or need to do. I will admit that I'm still scared to lift anything remotely heavy. But I think that fear will abate when my body starts to feel more normal again. For now, I'm giving myself a wide berth.
I was very inactive for months -- and very out of shape -- so going for long brisk walks or doing the exercise bike makes me feel really good about my body. In the coming weeks I hope to do other exercises I had stopped doing.
The fear is probably the hardest thing to beat back. When you've been in so much pain for so long, it's hard NOT to feel fear. But I'm making small bits of progress. As long as I feel that I'm moving forward, everything is good.
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Habitual tighening of muscles causing pain
