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Kajsa
Denmark
144 Posts |
 Posted - 01/14/2005 : 07:05:40
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Baby steps …or just dive into the water??
I read the board quite often but have not written for a some time.
My bad fatigue is actually much better and guess what: the PAIN
came back! burning, tingling…all the time.
I thought that was all over and I have stopped fearing it. (Now it scares me
a bit but not like before. But it is painful and depressive. )
I was nearly pain free for 6 months (diagnosed with fibromyalgia) and quite sure that the pain was gone, but
under my pain free period my fatigue got worse.
Well -this is so obvious I guess. I should laugh at it (and I try
but it is a bit hard sometimes).
Most of all I am so damned tired of my symptoms and my struggle
And I have had a lot of thoughts about just “diving into the water”
Go to a gym, ignore the fatigue completely etc. Just DO all the things I want to and completely ignore my symptoms. I mean fight the symptoms really, really aggressive.
But in the same time I fear that that kind of approach perhaps would be contra productive.
That it will but me on a emotional treadmill (if you can express it like that?).
Have anyone of you had success with “a very aggressive approach”.
Dave often (modestly and with a lot of wisdom) talks about “the long perspective and patience and a lot of you have talked about baby steps).
I am (as a nature) kind of an “either-or” person. Perhaps that has contributed to my symptoms.
Anyway - in just two weeks I am going to San Diego. I try to diet a bit because I have seen an bay watch
how you Americans look in that area (no wonder I am in pain….).
KAJSA
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UK-Pete
United Kingdom
17 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2005 : 07:57:03
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it took me a while after my pain had subsided to beging sport again. i kept making excuses (too busy etc) but then just decided to go for it. Tried a couple of very gentle jogs. Yes, lots of me hurt, but not my old TMS-driven pain locations. I then had a go at playing my old favourite - football (or soccer as some call it). The good thing about going for a team sport, or at least something that requires lots of concentration, is that you don't have time to worry about potential pain. I was more concerned with just how bad I was after 5 years without playing! And the next few days, how I ached - but it was a good ache, that old feeling I used to remember from pushing muscles that had been inactive for a while.
To be honest I quickly forgot I had problems in the past - until they came back again just recently, but I am not fooled - it is TMS striking me back, and nothing to do with the exercise.
So, what to recommend? Trust your own judgement I suppose, but the danger I see of going too gentle is that you may be overly aware of how your body is feeling. Perhaps focus on an activity that isn't necessarily physically extreme, but that will occupy your mind so you can't be too concious of feedback from your body
good luck |
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tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2005 : 09:34:09
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Kajsa,
Glad to hear you are doing the trip to Cal. If you're coming to San Francisco look me up. I own an historic old hotel in the North Beach/Fisherman's Wharf area. I'll give you and your friend the special TMS discount.
Don't worry about your figure and loseing weight. There are plenty of fat people in California. Your concern about your figure is showing your TMS worrier personality - don't worry be happy.
As far as jumping in to exercise, I would advise you to read my posts. I don't have time at the moment to recount my bio but I would advise you to JUST GO FOR IT!. If you injure something it will confuse your gremlin with new sites and when you experience the TMS pain movements you'll gain more insight into the workings of your TMS pain system. Read my old posts so I don't get message board burn out.
You have to get over being worried about injuring your body. The body is strong, it is the mind that is weak. Think about Evel Knievel - he's broken every bone in his body numerous times. He was given the same body as the rest of us. The difference is that he is FEARLESS.
I experience the same TMS pattern you are having. As my physical TMS gets better it migrates to emotional TMS equivalents like depression, sleep disruption, and over-eating. I take it as a sign that I'm getting better.
I did a yoga class for the first time in years yesterday, just on the spur of the moment. It was pleasant and not overly challenging. I felt kind of disappointed we didn't do any head or hand-stands though.
Namaste
tt |
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Michele
249 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2005 : 09:53:06
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Fight it
Dive in
Don't be afraid! It sounds like your fear is holding you back.
As for how us women look in America? Um . . . it's definitely not Baywatch!!
I hope you have a fantastic time in the United States!!
Tennis Tom - have you tried Bikram Yoga? Yoga in a room heated to about 110 degrees. The same 26 poses, done twice. I was doing it this summer to "help with the pain", so I stopped because I was going for the wrong reasons. On Jan. 2, I went back to the class for totally different reasons and I walked out with very little pain, unlike the other times. |
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tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2005 : 15:21:50
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Hi Michele,
No I haven't tried Bikram. Heard a lot about it though and hope to try it sometime. I'm hopeing to get back into going to Yoga classes after a hiatus from them for several years.
About five years ago when my I had "lower back"/TMS, I did a three day Yoga Back-Bending Intensive Workshop and came through with flying colors. Did every back-bend there was. I lost any fear of having a weak back.
I thought about that yesterday after Yoga class. My TMS morphed to my hip region showing up on imaging as arthritis. The original x-ray was dx'ed by a chiro as pinched nerve L4/L5, creating a loss of confidence in my back. Later docs, who pinned my TMS on the hip said, in fact, my back looked very strong - go figure.
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n/a
374 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2005 : 15:43:01
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Could your upcoming trip to California being stressing you out a little, Kajsa? I found that anticipating something that I knew would be enjoyable was enough to bring on my back pain. I think that with TMS prone people - anything out of the ordinary can be enough to bring on the symptoms we dread.
I have never treated my syptoms aggressively - but from reading the board, lots of people who post here have success by doing just that. If you are not sure maybe a compromise would work - a short workout, followed by a leisurely walk. Personally, I'd go to a book store and buy a travel book about the area you are visiting, take it to your favourite cafe, sit in a window seat with a very fattening coffee with cream and a Danish pastry (are those delicious flaky cakes really Danish) and look at the pictures in the book. OK, maybe not all that fattening stuff, but I've found being very good to myself a great way to treat TMS.
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Kajsa
Denmark
144 Posts |
Posted - 01/15/2005 : 04:45:01
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"If you're coming to San Francisco look me up. I own an historic old hotel in the North Beach/Fisherman's Wharf area. I'll give you and your friend the special TMS discount."
Thank you! I wouldn´t go go there for the discount but because it would be so nice to meet you!
But I do not think that we are going to S.F. this time.
Thank you everybody for your answers!
I read them several times.
Kajsa |
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Susie
USA
319 Posts |
Posted - 01/17/2005 : 10:34:31
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| Kajsa, I'll bet there is a little anxiety over your trans-atlantic trip causing some stress. I've watched your posts and posted with you before, and I know you really believe in and "get" Sarno. Perhaps you have some trepidation over the long plane flight or are worried that you will be pain free to enjoy your trip. Did the pain begin with your plans to travel? I find that when I make plans to do something "confining" I will trip my tms triggers. I am aware of it and can usually disuade them promptly by recognizing their cause. If you want to exercise, you should jump in. You already know it won't hurt you. |
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Kajsa
Denmark
144 Posts |
Posted - 01/18/2005 : 01:00:14
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Thank you Susie!
The big step for me was to actually sa YES to my friend:I will go with you to San Diego.
I am still a bit worried of course (will I have fatigue etc...).
But I am also looking forward to it.
I am very afraid of flying, but NOT because the flight will cause TMS.
Actually the flight makes me feel less concerned about TMS. My goal with the trip is to survive! - and not die in the Atlantic sea -
and compared with that TMS seems somehow harmelss
Two days ago I decided to be very active. I was out all day long, shoped and walked and carried things. I got really tired, the pain was bad in the morning; but told myself "come on , you are tired because you are stressed. You are a normal woman, 43 years old - you should be able to be up and about walking the whole day through."
Through the day the pain and the fatigue subsided...
Of course I tried this approach a lot of times before and OFTEN failed.
But the fact that I sometimes have succes is a clear proof that the effort/walking etc
itself NOT brings on the pain and fatigue (because then
it would do that everytime). Sometimes the exercise even make me feel better/more energetic.
And I think I can see a pattern -the success come more often these days.
The pain are still very moderate and I am happy. When the pain and fatigue isn´t there - I am quite good at "forgetting" it never happend...
I do not know if that is good or bad?
Kajsa
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Baseball65
USA
734 Posts |
Posted - 01/18/2005 : 10:59:35
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Hey Kajsa!
Don't be fooled by Baywatch...Americans are the statistically most overweight people in the world!!
I worked in the TV/Film industry,and most of those women you see on TV look just like anybody else with all their make-up and clothes off....some actually look a little....uhhh....chewed up?
My wifes gained about 20 lbs since we got married,and I still think she's the prettiest girl in the world(when we're not fighting)
The people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind
I had the luxury of being on disability and devoting 24 hours a day to intense re-conditioning and self evaluation....the aggressive approach.
After a rapid recovery,I did NOT have to stay on an emotional treadmill....just have to do some reviewing from time to time.
I know I might seem a tad over enthusiastic at times,but this was one of the first things in my life that I "got" right away and I always ,out of a feeling of moral indebtedness to Dr. Sarno,feel the "moral imperative" to shout it from the rooftops,so to speak.
DIVE....run as fast as you can,do a double flip,triple twist and DIVE in to it head first...you'll always come back to the surface...it's just the nature of the thing.
Hope you have a blast in San Diego
La Jolla is one of the prettiest Beaches in all of California.
peace
Baseball65 |
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tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
Posted - 01/19/2005 : 18:38:40
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Hi Kajsa,
How's the trip coming along. Is the conference your friend is attending at the Torrey Pines Hilton? If so, that's a real nice place. Have you picked out any touristy things to see. La Jolla has a nice downtown and a modern art museum. San Diego has a good zoo. And there's always Disneyland. |
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JohnD
USA
371 Posts |
Posted - 01/19/2005 : 20:22:49
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| take baby steps if you need to gain more confidence in the diagnosis. observe the inconsistencies in your pain. slowly increase your intensity and keep doing the work. the more tms work you do, the more confidence you will gain and the more physical activity you will be able to do without any doubt. |
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Kajsa
Denmark
144 Posts |
Posted - 01/20/2005 : 07:41:21
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Thank you , thank you for all the advices!!
I really need them and I read and learn.
I think I have to do "the work" more constantly and more sincerely.
It is easy to drop the motivation when the pain easies - but I am not
there yet. I am still on "the treadmill".
I am proud and happy over my descision (going to San Diego).
My flight leaved next suturday.
I do not think I will regerett that - whatsoever
(I am not at home and do not have a dictionary so forgive my spelling...).
The company is situated in La Jolla but the medical conferens is hold down town San Diego. There will be a lot of doctors and scientist from
Europe as well.
. My boyfrind (actually he is 44 years old -and I am 43 so "boyfriend" sounds very childish. What do yoy say?) is going to speach and participate so I will have a lot of time of my own.
I really like that because I am a "lonley woolf" (danish expression)
Love to walk around, sit at cafées and read and so on - as much as I like to sosialice.
I do not know wich hotel we will stay in because I am just "going along" I do not arrange anything myself (nice for a change).
I work part time as a freelancejournalist and I have made some jokes
to my boyfrind about contacting Michel Moore. Do some undercover
interviews for him from the medical conference. He´ latest film is called SICKO (I think) and I think that he really will gice the medical companies some hard time.
But I will be a good girl and neither do that nor make a big speach about Doctor Sarno.
You have to choose your wars! (another danish expression)
All the best,
Kajsa
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agressive !
