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Northwoodsmama
USA
2 Posts |
 Posted - 11/08/2015 : 18:23:06
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Hi all
Thank you for letting me write on here.
I had pelvic pain 10 years ago that got better for several years until last year. I had a tough time of it lady winter but them got better for awhile February until July, Ups and downs, but functional and had many really good days during those months. Then the last year was draining and stressful for so many reasons, mainly my job. I made job changes within thst job in January ( improved some) and quit that job beginning of June because I knew it was still wrong for me. ( I do currently love my new job but the pain still continues). But 3 days after I quit the job ( in June) that was stressing me out and working 55 hours a week at, and was ready to get my life back completely, I get the phone call that my brother was found unresponsive in a coma. He wasn't expected to make it through the night. Through a lot of prayer he came to 3 days later. Long story short, he's an alcoholic who caused his liver to fail. He has end stage liver failure. Needing a liver transplant. It's been a long hard emotional several months since June. He's had many health ups and downs . He went into another hepatic coma in august from the disease. Insurance issues so he was kicked out of nursing home in July. I took him into my home. I have 3 busy kids also. It was a nightmare. I am not equipped to care for him. His mind isn't right. One night he had a setback while here and pooped everywhere in my house. No human being should have to clean what I did thst night! He's currently back in nursing home because of severe health needs. And I won't take him back. He's got a court order for protective placement anyway because of being found incompetant. But I am his legal guardian. He's 53. Thst has been incredibly stressful to me with selling his home, dealing with assets to trying get him on medical assistance, and disability. Court dates, doctor appts, , lawyer appt, paperwork, so much red tape.
Anyway since September, my pelvic floor muscles and legs are ridiculously tense! I've journaled. My anger is very clear to me. I went from one terribly stressful job into this with my brother! I've had no break I guess. I'm mad at him for causing all this because he wouldn't quit the drinking. My mom has been having a lot if pain also the last few months since my brother got sick. Doctors diagnosed it as arthritis. But she was doing pretty well until this. Arthritis comes on that fast? Really? It's the stress. My brother is very unappreciative and rude to us at times. And manipulative at times to me. He still isn't making great choices but because he's living in controlled environment of nursung home, he's at least not drinking.
My sister and dad died within months of each other a couple years ago. My husband thinks I'm actually very scared of losing another sibling. But I don't think I sm actually. I think my brother will stay at the point he is fir quite awhile. But maybe my husband is right. Who knows.
I feel less compassionate towards my brother than I was at the beginning because I'm simply drained. I'm so busy and I don't visit him everyday like I use to. I can't between the pain and my schedule with work, kids and his affairs to get taken care if, I don't have it in me. Plus at times, I fear his moods, but because i dont feel as emotionally
Supportive as I should and that is cresting much guilt.
Anyway I do know for I'm angry ( among other emotions) and I'm sure that's leading to my my stupid daily pain. My life is so busy everyday with my brothers crap, my kids busy schedules, helping my mom, and my new job. I feel overwhelmed and even when I try to relax, I can't. Please someone help learn how I can I relax and how can I let go of the frustration and anger? And tell me the pelvic stuff will leave. I've gotten my life back to normal before why am I struggling so very much now? Tired of the pain, tired of crying, and tired of feeling stressed and bitter Over the situation.
I'm sorry for sounding so pessimistic, I just am so desperate for this pain to leave. It is tms, right? With the way it has come and gone? I just need to be OK again. I'm not very emotionally stable these days. Thank you for allowing me to vent and for any advise.
Northwoods mama
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andy64tms
USA
589 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2015 : 12:15:40
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Hi Northwoods mamma,
In the TMS world, Alan Gordon’s Interview with Dustin, (one of our servicemen) is almost famous; for it portrays the mixed feelings of guilt, rage and love we have for the ones close to us. This revealing interview took place July 21 2012 on a webinar. Get yourself a glass of wine and allow a good ½ hour. Here is the link:
http://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/TMS_Webinars
Pelvic issues, not my bag.
Look at user, Alix on this web site, we have a very good search feature.
Type "pelvic" in the search.
Also Abigale Steinberg - Therapist
https://abigailsteidley.com/learn-the-tools-lose-the-pelvic-pain/
I recommend you duplicate post on the tmswiki.org as traffic is slow on this site currently.
Welcome - you will be well and happy.
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
Edited by - andy64tms on 11/09/2015 14:04:37 |
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Northwoodsmama
USA
2 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2015 : 16:53:54
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| Thank you so much Andy!!! |
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Just looking for encouragement
