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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2012 :  07:29:50  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Tell me what this sounds like...I walk up 22 steps to Sunday School class every Sunday morning with no sciatica provoked. But last night, I went up 30 steps to the second floor of the mall and immediately I got severe sciatica - which this morning is still with me...Other information - I didn't expect to have to go up the steps last night. I thought my wife and son were going to take the escalator or elevator. I was a little annoyed with them. I followed them up the steps - not wanting to be viewed as the wimp. I was afraid in advance that this might be "too many" steps.

Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2012 :  07:50:20  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
More information...My son is going out of town this August to start college. I am very, very close to him. We were shopping for a lap top for him to take to school.
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2012 :  12:56:53  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Classic TMS with conditioning? Yes? No?
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drh7900

USA
194 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2012 :  14:56:54  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Sounds like it to me. I have no idea what your history with TMS is, but I see that you have over 400 posts, so I imagine you're pretty experienced in the matter. As I read/interpret what you wrote I see a couple of things:

1) "I was a little annoyed with them." - could be translated to "I was angry about having to climb the stairs when I expected to take the escalator" possibly combined with "especially when they know I have trouble with lots of stairs".

2) "I was afraid in advance that this might be 'too many' steps" = "I was fearing the pain" which is a no-no for TMS recovery.

3) "...not wanting to be viewed as the wimp." - "I was afraid that others would think less of me" (classic TMS personality trait).

4) "I went up 30 steps..." - you counted the steps...this is something you should not do if you're recovering/recovered from TMS pain...counting the steps adds to the anxiety that the pain will set in eventually.

5) DISCLAIMER: take this one as observational only, I'm not attempting any kind of diagnosis here: "My son is going out of town...I am very, very close to him. We were shopping for...school." - could be another way of saying "I am close to my son...and like many others in my life, now he's leaving me, too. The shopping we were doing was to help him leave and I didn't want to do it".

6) DISCLAIMER: this one might sound rude...I don't mean it to, in fact it's partly in jest: (5 hours after no response) "Classic TMS with conditioning? Yes? No?" - "Holy crap! Someone answer me already! I'm feeling alone enough without being ignored here!

Please understand that my #5 and #6 statements come from my own experience in the fear of loneliness I have identified in my life. I do not mean to project it into what I read in your words and if that's not the case, disregard. It's just how it sounded to me.

All in all, sounds like classic TMS to me. I hope at least the first 4 observations made sense :)

--
Dustin
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tennis tom

USA
4746 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2012 :  15:00:56  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Could be TMS, it's interesting that you keep track of the number of steps--22, 30. Also that your family is unaware of your TMS/sciataca, or not attentive to it. Maybe it's not because they are thoughtless of you, just that they are unaware of it because you don't discuss it with them, not wanting to appear to be a "wimp". Your son's leaving could be a source; change in your status quo/homeostasis, (see the Rahe-Holmes list--TMS often begins at home.

G'luck

==================================================

DR. SARNO'S 12 DAILY REMINDERS:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0dKBFwGR0g

TAKE THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS TEST
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale

Some of my favorite excerpts from _THE DIVIDED MIND_ :
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605

==================================================

"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." Jiddu Krishnamurti

"Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." Author Unknown

"Happy People Are Happy Putters." Frank Nobilo, Golf Analyst

"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint." Mark Twain and Balto
======================================================

TMS PRACTITIONERS:

John Sarno, MD
400 E 34th St, New York, NY 10016
(212) 263-6035


Here's the TMS practitioners list from the TMS Help Forum:
http://www.tmshelp.com/links.htm

Here's a list of TMS practitioners from the TMS Wiki:
http://tmswiki.org/ppd/Find_a_TMS_Doctor_or_Therapist


Here's a map of TMS practitioners from the old Tarpit Yoga site, (click on the map by state for listings).:
http://www.tarpityoga.com/2007_08_01_archive.html

Edited by - tennis tom on 06/19/2012 15:02:10
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2012 :  15:11:44  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks for the excellent responses. Just trying not to think physical and need support not to do so.
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Bugbear

United Kingdom
152 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2012 :  15:13:28  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I enjoyed your interpretations, Dustin, especially points 5 and 6.

Fox, what I want to add is about your son leaving, or more to the point, starting a new chapter in his life, one that will most likely involve you less. I have read so many articles in magazines about mothers experiencing empty nest syndrome. You don't hear much about how dads feel. It is so poignant that you recognize the close relationship you and your son share and how his leaving is affecting you. Some dads might bury their feelings, immerse themselves in their work, pretend that it doesn't bother them. Let yourself feel, express how you feel, talk to your wife and your son if you think it appropriate and/or write about your feelings, say sod the pain and go for a long walk in the woods, have a good cry. Whatever you do, don't bury your feelings.

Hugs,
Bugbear
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drh7900

USA
194 Posts

Posted - 06/20/2012 :  05:48:02  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Fox,

After my post yesterday, I clicked on your profile to see what topics you've commented on to see if I could get a better idea of where you're coming from. The only recent one was the one about that TMS doc from PA who is no longer practicing TMS recovery. I noted that you gave an indication that you were helped through TMS 7 or 8 years ago...so given the circumstances of your son getting ready to leave for school, I'd say it sounds like there's a very good chance that this big change in your life is a good candidate for TMS sourced pain.

If you haven't already, I'd recommend reading SteveO's book "The Great Pain Deception". He goes into a lot of detail about the causes of pain in our lives. One of the things he mentions is that change is "scary"...I know I've always been hesitant about change. I like things to be status quo. But I think it can be taken to a whole new level when that change involves your own child (with whom you are very close) is getting ready to start a new chapter in his life and the uncertainty of where that might leave you is "good reason" to to push those emotions down..."for your own good" and so you don't inadvertently "give him reason not to go".

Remember, if these are emotions going on just under or even deep under the surface...they're likely to cause a re-emergence of TMS pain until your brain knows you can't be distracted from them.

--
Dustin
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 06/20/2012 :  12:06:28  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks for the input. It helped me to avoid getting suckered into thinking physical by my sneaky brain. The intense sciatic pain in the butt and leg/foot is nearly gone. Just had to wait it out and think psychological.
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drh7900

USA
194 Posts

Posted - 06/20/2012 :  13:37:50  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Fox

Thanks for the input. It helped me to avoid getting suckered into thinking physical by my sneaky brain. The intense sciatic pain in the butt and leg/foot is nearly gone. Just had to wait it out and think psychological.



Great to hear, Fox. That kind of pain is, well...a pain! Sciatic pain (as I've experienced over the last 12 years) is awful. Very easy to think it's physical. Glad you avoided the mental snare!

--
Dustin
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/26/2012 :  12:16:09  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Can't believe it. Now I can't walk up the 22 steps at church without intense pain in the butt, leg, and foot. It has happened 3 times straight - this morning was the third time. The other 2 times it took 3-4 days for the pain to stop. No problem with going down the steps - only up the steps...My son went to college last weekend. I was really sad for months before event and also during the move, but I started feeling much better a few days after the event (surprisingly). So the step-related pain has happened before and after the move - when very sad and when most of the sadness was gone...I have no problem with the 12 steps at home (two story house)...My wife is embarrassed to go up the (extremely slow) elevator at church with me. I am 63 and she is 53. Only the old folks go up the elevator. You wait in the busy hallway on the first floor for the elevator and it takes one or two long minutes for it to show up - while most everyone else is buzzing by and going up the steps (right next to the elevator). You can see folks bounding up the steps because the steps are open to view (not behind a door)...My wife and I agreed after church today that she would take the steps and I would take the elevator from now on. I don't feel happy with this because I feel like a wimp and we will be entering the Sunday School class at different times - her entering first because the elevator, filled with really old folks, takes much longer than the steps...On more thing - I got twinges of pain and some numbness in the foot 15 seconds before I started to walk up the steps this morning - so there must be some mental component, and I suspect it is all TMS. However, the pain, weakness, and tingling got much, much worse as I reached the top of the steps...My 94 year old Dad, a supportive guy - an extremely smart guy - who does not believe in TMS - tells me that my body (my spine) is telling me that I have the physical capacity to walk up 12 steps but not much more...One more thing - I had the same problem with (20) steps in my last job - about 8 years ago - so I started using the elevator - there was no problem/no embarrassment there - because my wife was not with me and few people at work headed for the second floor at the same time as me - in the morning or after lunchtime...So for several years I have been going up the church steps with no pain, but now it is a big problem...What do I do? Keep going up the steps at church and face several days of intense pain or give in and be the old guy taking the elevator?...I'm doing almost everything else that I used to do except running and weight lifting and throwing punches from the back side (like right crosses - okay with jabs and lead hooks) and kicks - because these activities give me leg pain - used to do all these things until "disc problems"...Should I go Fred Amir style and throw myself into all these activities at once, damn the pain, and see if the pain goes away after a few days or weeks?
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bryan3000

USA
513 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  01:12:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I don't know, but that embarrassed wife business is giving ME tms just reading it.
No offense, but it just stuck out to me. I wonder what other areas of your life feel this way. To me, that represents a bigger problem than the steps.
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  08:14:45  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Good point. Think I am a little angry about this. Adds fuel to the fire.
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tennis tom

USA
4746 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  08:42:02  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Fox

...My wife is embarrassed to go up the (extremely slow) elevator at church with me. I am 63 and she is 53. Only the old folks go up the elevator. You wait in the busy hallway on the first floor for the elevator and it takes one or two long minutes for it to show up - while most everyone else is buzzing by and going up the steps (right next to the elevator). You can see folks bounding up the steps because the steps are open to view (not behind a door)...My wife and I agreed after church today that she would take the steps and I would take the elevator from now on. I don't feel happy with this because I feel like a wimp and we will be entering the Sunday School class at different times - her entering first because the elevator, filled with really old folks, takes much longer than the steps...

...My 94 year old Dad, a supportive guy - an extremely smart guy - who does not believe in TMS - tells me that my body (my spine) is telling me that I have the physical capacity to walk up 12 steps but not much more...



What I'm getting from this is the lack of support from your wife and your dad. The biggest cause of TMS is relationships. I doubt if you can change your dad's views at 94 but is your wife TMS savy?--that your condition is emotional, not structural and how her lack of support is damaging to your recovery?

G'luck

==================================================

DR. SARNO'S 12 DAILY REMINDERS:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0dKBFwGR0g

TAKE THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS TEST
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale

Some of my favorite excerpts from _THE DIVIDED MIND_ :
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605

==================================================

"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." Jiddu Krishnamurti

"Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." Author Unknown

"Happy People Are Happy Putters." Frank Nobilo, Golf Analyst

"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint." Mark Twain and Balto

"The hot-dog is the noblest of dogs; it feeds the hand that bites it." Dr. Laurence Johnston Peter
======================================================

TMS PRACTITIONERS:

John Sarno, MD
400 E 34th St, New York, NY 10016
(212) 263-6035


Here's the TMS practitioners list from the TMS Help Forum:
http://www.tmshelp.com/links.htm

Here's a list of TMS practitioners from the TMS Wiki:
http://tmswiki.org/ppd/Find_a_TMS_Doctor_or_Therapist


Here's a map of TMS practitioners from the old Tarpit Yoga site, (click on the map by state for listings).:
http://www.tarpityoga.com/2007_08_01_archive.html
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drh7900

USA
194 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  09:11:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
If you think you're "a little angry" about this...there's a pretty good chance your id is screaming and stomping and throwing tantrums about it...your brain doesn't want the conscious you to know that, so it creates the distraction. As TMSers, we have learned so well how to hide our negative emotions that we have actually learned how to suppress them to the point of not feeling them. That's the whole cause of TMS.

Are you doing any "TMS exercises" like reviewing the daily reminders or journaling? Have you worked with relaxation techniques at all? How about indulging yourself with things you love to do?

Find and feel your emotions and introduce more pleasure into your life...and then this, too, shall pass.

Since you mention church in your posts, I'm going to put a spiritual "spin" on this:

Jesus did three things when He healed the paralytic that was brought to Him. First, He told the man to be of good cheer. It would be pretty hard, as a paralytic, not to feel down and out and sorry for yourself. Second, He told the man his sins were forgiven. Whatever the man had done that he was feeling guilty about, the Son of God was telling him that he was forgiven...forgiveness is an important step in the TMS process. Lastly, He told the man to get up, pick up his bed, and walk home...there's no indication that He even touched the man...he just instructed the man to take charge of his condition by getting up and carrying his bed home.

In this one biblical story of Christ healing someone, we are given a very simple explanation of TMS healing. Positive energy, forgiveness, action.

--
Dustin
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  12:01:05  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks for the great suggestions...Tennis Tom - my wife for years has not believed at all in TMS. Lately, however, I sense she may be a little more open to the idea of TMS. I try not to mention my symptoms at all around her because she does not like to talk about any aches and pains - she is very stoic, I must admit, about her own physical problems. At some level, I admire this quality in her...In my family, only my brother (who lives in town and is a great friend and source of support) believes in Sarno - because of Sarno he no longer has lower back pain...He told me last night to go to the gym and suck up the pain (Fred Amir approach). If only this pain were less intense, I would try this. I do fear this pain because it seems off the charts while it is in effect. The last time I tried the gym (years ago) for this purpose, I made it through 3 workout sessions and I was in terribe pain for a week.
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  12:03:53  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Oh, in defense of my Dad, he is the most supportive person I have ever met. The problem is - he doesn't believe in any mind body ideas. He is totally into the structural and "new age" alternative, nontraditional, physical and vitamin treatments.
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drh7900

USA
194 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  13:15:45  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Fox

Oh, in defense of my Dad, he is the most supportive person I have ever met. The problem is - he doesn't believe in any mind body ideas. He is totally into the structural and "new age" alternative, nontraditional, physical and vitamin treatments.



I'm curious...because this statement seems "off" - but how can one not believe in mind-body ideas, but be into "new age" alternative treatments? Much of "new-age" treatment is mind-body and spiritual. Or have I misunderstood something?

--
Dustin
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Fox

USA
496 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  14:31:24  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I should not have said "new age" - actually some of them are real, real "old age" - but one thing in common is that they are all structural/physical - acupuncture with or without electricity, chiropractic, taking various vitamins and other supplements, washing the disc area with saline (whatever that is called), deep muscle massage - I can't remember them all - I have tried them all out of respect to him and they have been ineffective.
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mala

Hong Kong
774 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  18:52:03  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Fox, sorry to hear that you are in pain.

i don't understand why such a big issue over the lift. I mean if u want to take it that's fine. If your wife wants to walk, that's fine too. No need for either of u to be embarrassed about what the other is doing. So what if you arrive a couple of minutes apart? That's no big deal either. She can keep a seat or you or wait for you outside . As for what others think, why does that bother u so much.



What is really bothering or annoying you. Be honest with yourself.

Hope u feel better soon

Mala

Honestly, I sometimes really get fed up with my subconscious. It's like it's got a mind of its own.

Alexei Sayle
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balto

839 Posts

Posted - 08/27/2012 :  20:13:19  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I think you care too much about what other people think or how you look to others.

You've been on this forum a long time, you probably have read everything there is to know about how to get rid of tms/anxiety. You probably just forgot them. In time of extreme pain we sometime forget or prograstinate.

If you tell us what you have been doing in term of dealing with your pain, maybe we together can figure out what you have done wrong or forget to do.

Have you:
journaling, meditating, yoga, affirmation, praying, positive self talk, stress reduction, therapy,.....?
Anything at all?

------------------------
No, I don't know everything. I'm just here to share my experience.
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