| Author |
 Topic  |
|
|
smoothd
29 Posts |
 Posted - 10/06/2015 : 08:46:02
|
hello, my name is tal im 28 male
ive been starting to have right knee pain and weakness 4 years ago after 2 years of hundreds of miles of jogging that developed to hip pain and finally to backpain on the right side near the right si joint and the buttock, very dreadful to do anything, specially sitting... the pain started to radiate to my leg 1 month after the back pain
that pain was so intense that i was on tons of morphine for 6 months,
the pain is constant and relentless,burning, stabbing, radiating my leg, inner thigh and hip, it also feels like my ilium bone is not fully attached to the sacrum
nothing shows on the mri - nothing! looks like im brand new, ive been to like 5 doctors witch dont know where the pain is coming from, some say it may be the si joint but its not inflamed (steroid injection clarification did no improvement)
the mild pain started 4 years ago with attacks and stayed constant since it started 2 years ago, i had to use cane to walk
ive tried everything eastern and western medicine have to offer with to avail.
after reading sarno's book, dr amir's books and others, im now sure i have tms. everything fits!
1) i grew up in a very sick home with a wicked mom that made everything to make up miserable and neuritic, she even used to slap us with a belt when we were really young, my father always looked away and didnt do anything about it, she is the worst person ive ever met in my life, she made terror in the house
2) im very obsessive person about my looks and wight, i look in the mirror all the time and weigh myself ,im also very perfectionist and its very hard for me to make a decision, im also tend to have depression
3) i also suffer from dust and dog allergy and asthma from childhood
4) the pain went out of the roof 2 weeks after i was fired from my job witch was very hard for me...
everything screams tms, i know i have tms!
ive been trying to implement some of the things that were written in the books like resuming activities, i moved out from my parents house to eliminate my mom from being a stress factor even that i dont work for 2 years and have no income ,i resumed psychology treatment, i returned to workout, i read reminders everyday, i meditate i try to resume all activities...
2 months after ive started i can say that there is about 15% improvement.. it feels like im stuck!
any crucial advisement will be helpful! thanks guys!
|
Edited by - smoothd on 10/06/2015 08:51:48 |
|
|
tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2015 : 10:24:10
|
quote:
Originally posted by smoothd
...it also feels like my ilium bone is not fully attached to the sacrum
...nothing shows on the mri - nothing! looks like im brand new, ive been to like 5 doctors witch dont know where the pain is coming from,
...after reading sarno's book, dr amir's books and others, im now sure i have tms. everything fits!
Sounds very likely to be TMS since nothing has been found structural on imaging by "5 doctors". Your ilium is attached to your sacrum otherwise they would have found that.
I believe the only ones who will understand what you are going through is a TMS practitioner. Find a TMS physician or therapist to consult with, if not in person then phone and skype works. There are lists of them here and at the TMS Wiki. SteveO is a good one.
==================================================
TAKE THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS TEST
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale
Some of my favorite excerpts from _THE DIVIDED MIND_ :
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605
==================================================
"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." Jiddu Krishnamurti
"Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." Author Unknown
“You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation” – Plato
"Happy People Are Happy Putters." Frank Nobilo, Golf Analyst
"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint." Mark Twain and Balto
"The hot-dog is the noblest of dogs; it feeds the hand that bites it." Dr. Laurence Johnston Peter
"...the human emotional system was not designed to endure the mental rigors of a tennis match." Dr. Allen Fox
"Where ignorance is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise" - Thomas Gray
"All my friends in Los Angeles are the sensitive type. They all have like all the diseases like Chronic Fatigue, Epstien Barr, Fibromyalgia. Like all the diseases where the only symptoms seem to be you had a really crappy childhood and at the prospect of full time work ya feel kinda achy and tired."
Posted by Skizzik @ TMSHelp from comedian Maria Bamford
======================================================
"If it ends with "itis" or "algia" or "syndrome" and doctors can't figure out what causes it, then it might be TMS." Dave the Mod
=================================================
TMS PRACTITIONERS:
John Sarno, MD
400 E 34th St, New York, NY 10016
(212) 263-6035
Dr. Sarno is now retired, if you call this number you will be referred to his associate Dr. Rashbaum.
"...there are so many things little and big that are tms, I wouldn't have time to write about all of them": Told to icelikeaninja by Dr. Sarno
Here's the TMS practitioners list from the TMS Help Forum:
http://www.tmshelp.com/links.htm
Here's a list of TMS practitioners from the TMS Wiki:
http://tmswiki.org/ppd/Find_a_TMS_Doctor_or_Therapist
|
 |
|
|
fredamir
87 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2015 : 19:22:19
|
Hi Tal,
AS you read in my book I had sciatica in both legs. So I fully sympathize with your pain.
Please review Ch. 4 on how I dealt with sciatica. It wasn't easy but it worked.
You can also join me for a free Rapid Recovery workshop via conference call on Saturday, Oct. 24. There are still a few spots available.
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=9780
Most importantly, keep your spirit up and know that if you win against TMS, you can enjoy life at a whole new level.
Take care,
Fred Amir
www.rapidrecovery.net
|
|
|
|
tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2015 : 23:32:44
|
quote:
Originally posted by tennis tom
I believe the only ones who will understand what you are going through is a TMS practitioner. Find a TMS physician or therapist to consult with, if not in person then phone and skype works. There are lists of them here and at the TMS Wiki. SteveO is a good one.
Also Fred Amir! |
|
|
|
smoothd
29 Posts |
Posted - 10/09/2015 : 09:11:48
|
quote:
Originally posted by tennis tom
quote:
Originally posted by tennis tom
I believe the only ones who will understand what you are going through is a TMS practitioner. Find a TMS physician or therapist to consult with, if not in person then phone and skype works. There are lists of them here and at the TMS Wiki. SteveO is a good one.
Also Fred Amir!
how do i contact these people? |
|
|
|
tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
Posted - 10/09/2015 : 10:21:12
|
Fred Amir's info is in his message to you below, Steve Ozaniche's is in the "LINKS" above.
Where are you? |
|
|
|
smoothd
29 Posts |
Posted - 10/09/2015 : 10:30:39
|
quote:
Originally posted by tennis tom
Fred Amir's info is in his message to you below, Steve Ozaniche's is in the "LINKS" above.
Where are you?
he is not on the list |
|
|
|
tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
|
|
smoothd
29 Posts |
|
|
tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
|
|
fredamir
87 Posts |
Posted - 10/09/2015 : 21:30:40
|
"i have a question do you think tms can cause real injury after a long time of oxy dep?"
I have never came across anyone who has had permanent damage due to TMS. Dr. Sarno never mentions any such cases.
HBy the way be careful now that you know about TMS because your subconscious may want to divert your tension and attention from pain to worry and anxiety.
Just know that thousands have recovered fully so can you!
Fred Amir
www.rapidrecovery.net
|
|
|
|
gazelle
USA
8 Posts |
Posted - 10/10/2015 : 05:29:48
|
I had achilles tendonitis for 10 years. It was really painful and despite being an ex-competitive runner I couldn't run or walk uphill. That was 10 years! I almost wanted my foot cut off so I could just do things on it. I thought it was with me for life. It's gone now - totally gone. Not a jot of pain (although I am sure it will jump back and give me a reminder now I wrote this) but I don't take it even slightly seriously. Loads of therapy - that was a tendon and all the therapists said there was so much scar tissue there. Even when I found out about TMS I thought it was permenantly damaged. But it has gone, totally. No damage. Not a jot.
so do you write lots? I mean lots. That is the best therapy for me. Write that long list of everything that pisses you off and then write like crazy, everyday. However childish and petulant it sounds. Then another trick is to pretend you are going to write your own book on TMS. Write about your injury, your discovery, your background, how bad you feel. Then write the recovery down. Write your success story before you recover - I think it gives your brain a road map - it only knows how to produce pain and doesn't know where to go next.
In face, I just wrote a long whining post, I am going to take my own advice. |
|
|
|
smoothd
29 Posts |
Posted - 10/12/2015 : 06:46:26
|
quote:
Originally posted by gazelle
I had achilles tendonitis for 10 years. It was really painful and despite being an ex-competitive runner I couldn't run or walk uphill. That was 10 years! I almost wanted my foot cut off so I could just do things on it. I thought it was with me for life. It's gone now - totally gone. Not a jot of pain (although I am sure it will jump back and give me a reminder now I wrote this) but I don't take it even slightly seriously. Loads of therapy - that was a tendon and all the therapists said there was so much scar tissue there. Even when I found out about TMS I thought it was permenantly damaged. But it has gone, totally. No damage. Not a jot.
so do you write lots? I mean lots. That is the best therapy for me. Write that long list of everything that pisses you off and then write like crazy, everyday. However childish and petulant it sounds. Then another trick is to pretend you are going to write your own book on TMS. Write about your injury, your discovery, your background, how bad you feel. Then write the recovery down. Write your success story before you recover - I think it gives your brain a road map - it only knows how to produce pain and doesn't know where to go next.
In face, I just wrote a long whining post, I am going to take my own advice.
man, you dont know what you did here for me.. this is gold, you made my week.. i have pain in my right knee and weakness for more then 4 years now, i was sure that its over for me, i had no trauma there it just started from nowhere, that gives me lots of hope! |
|
|
|
smoothd
29 Posts |
Posted - 10/12/2015 : 07:41:19
|
quote:
Originally posted by smoothd
quote:
Originally posted by gazelle
I had achilles tendonitis for 10 years. It was really painful and despite being an ex-competitive runner I couldn't run or walk uphill. That was 10 years! I almost wanted my foot cut off so I could just do things on it. I thought it was with me for life. It's gone now - totally gone. Not a jot of pain (although I am sure it will jump back and give me a reminder now I wrote this) but I don't take it even slightly seriously. Loads of therapy - that was a tendon and all the therapists said there was so much scar tissue there. Even when I found out about TMS I thought it was permenantly damaged. But it has gone, totally. No damage. Not a jot.
so do you write lots? I mean lots. That is the best therapy for me. Write that long list of everything that pisses you off and then write like crazy, everyday. However childish and petulant it sounds. Then another trick is to pretend you are going to write your own book on TMS. Write about your injury, your discovery, your background, how bad you feel. Then write the recovery down. Write your success story before you recover - I think it gives your brain a road map - it only knows how to produce pain and doesn't know where to go next.
In face, I just wrote a long whining post, I am going to take my own advice.
man, you dont know what you did here for me.. this is gold, you made my week.. i have pain in my right knee and weakness for more then 4 years now, i was sure that its over for me, i had no trauma there it just started from nowhere, that gives me lots of hope!
ive started to write and my list of amazingly long, i now understand how my bad childhood and life experiences manifested them selfs into pains, im a classic tmser
1) was a fat kid that everyone made fun of me, i also had man boobs witch where the center of jokes in my classroom
2) wicked satanic witch emotionally abusive mom who made my life
miserable since childhood, she slapped us with a belt and called us names, she called me Pig and told me " , i wish you were never born" this bitch! she is obsessive control freak and used to take everything we cared about to control us,i sometimes feel like i want to smash her head with a stone.
3) father who was running away from all what was going in the house, he was afraid of my mom and was letting her to abuse us however she wanted
4) i generate constant inferiority and anxiety feelings due the a feeling of having bad genes, i have eyeglasses, im balding, i have man boobs, i get fat easy etc..
5) i used to take propecia - anti baldness drug who lowered my libido from 10 to like 2, it persisted even after ive stopped taking it till today! that made me extremely anxious.
6) i tend to be depressed a lot and when i was 20 i had panic attacks due to feeling of no meaning in life- i know that in a manifestation of tms due to was ive been threw in my childhood of life
7) i have obsessive compulsive neurotic, perfectionist tendencies
,im very hard on myself and never pleased with myself, im a designer and even that im very good at what i do i always feel im not good enough and i never proud of my work, when i look at the mirror i always look for the bad things like my thinning hair, eyeglasses, and then i leave in shame...
no more feeling bad! no more! no moer repressing all of these feelings! no more generating bad feelings! i will fix my life now!
i have all the reasons in the world for my body to get sick, i thank him for the pain! its time to get my life together and heal my soul witch was abused for too long by me and others!!!
Time to heal, time for inner thoughts and conclusions!
wish me luck guys |
Edited by - smoothd on 10/12/2015 07:49:02 |
|
|
|
fredamir
87 Posts |
Posted - 10/13/2015 : 18:19:34
|
Thanks for sharing Tal.
You've dealt with a lot but I see you are on the right track now. Just go easy on yourself and srt your mind that eventually you will health physically, mentally, and emotionally. So keep writing!
Fred Amir
www.rapidrecovery.net
|
|
|
|
smoothd
29 Posts |
Posted - 10/15/2015 : 13:39:20
|
quote:
Originally posted by fredamir
Thanks for sharing Tal.
You've dealt with a lot but I see you are on the right track now. Just go easy on yourself and srt your mind that eventually you will health physically, mentally, and emotionally. So keep writing!
Fred Amir
www.rapidrecovery.net
i recall now that during this 1.8 years of pain i was living in my parents house and i had a few episodes of extreme rage bursts that were triggered by my devil mom who is the only person in the world that can cause me this rage.. the rage was so sever that i was loosing my mind and sanity completely, i could kill someone easly (my mom), i was kicking stuff and i even once threw a garbage can for 20 feet to the other side of the house and all the garbage dropped on the kitchen floor...i almost fainted a few times from the rage, i couldnt catch my breath for an hour later, ive realized i have enormous amount of rage and frustration inside of me.. enormous! add that to the children who bullied me when i was young and called me fat all the time. |
|
|
|
summabody
Canada
27 Posts |
Posted - 10/29/2015 : 22:28:34
|
Welcome Tal,
I hope you find recovery stories through this and other TMS resources encouraging. Knowing others have been through and come out the other side can help a lot, and knowing that it can sometimes take some time for the pain to disappear but you are on the right track arming yourself with knowledge and support.
It sounds like your mother may have narcissistic personality disorder, you may want to look into this type of support as well, there are many online resources and even Youtube channels that can help with this side of recovery too for adult children of narcissists. |
|
|
| |
Topic |
|
|
|
suicida after 2 years of constant insane back pain
