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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
 Posted - 11/11/2014 : 18:37:11
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| Thanks everyone for the support. Today I took my kids to the park an although I was in quite a bit of pain I felt a lot better in general. I am gaining hope which is something I haven't had in a while. Alix I know you have experienced the pain I have and am wondering if you are pain free with no limitations? As you mention the success with physical modalities seems to be nil. I am just hoping I can resume my job at some point. Probably not best to continue to seek reassurance but I am early on and every bit of hope helps tremendously. Thanks guys. |
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alix
USA
434 Posts |
Posted - 11/11/2014 : 20:43:22
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| MAC1986, absolutely no limitation. I sit as long as I want. It is interesting to hear people that "claim" to have had successful decompression surgeries but still cannot sit on a hard chair. |
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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
Posted - 11/11/2014 : 21:08:04
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| That's awesome! I'm excited. Finally some hope for this thing. Funny thing is I have always sat better on hard chairs. Other thing is my symptoms constantly move around. Mostly within the territory of the nerve but not always. They are very inconsistent. I have it on both sides which to me it seems nearly impossible to develop bilateral entrapment or even neuralgia simultaneously during a time I was taking a break from working out and did not injure myself in any way. More evidence of tms I suppose. Thanks again. So happy to hear a success story that doesn't involve standing lying down the rest of my life. |
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andy64tms
USA
589 Posts |
Posted - 11/11/2014 : 22:54:49
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Hi Mac1986
No Limitations! When I became to believe my back pain was bogus in 2000 I took up windsurfing. Its 14 years later and I’m still at it. It is as you say: “awesome and very exciting”.
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2014 : 19:48:26
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| Great news Andy. I can't wait to resume my active lifestyle. I haven't had the guts to stop physical treatments but I am at the point that I feel everything I do makes me worse. It's pretty scary to abandon all I have ever learned about medicine but I think I have hit a wall in my recovery. I am excited for appointment Friday and want to thank you all for your support and awesome success stories. Last night I was able to again make my pain disappear using the technique I used last time. I laid in bed and tried to feel the anger that I once ignored. I have always prided myself on being so level headed and never losing my cool. Maybe it wasn't such a good thing after all. Now if I could just get the pain to stay away. |
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andy64tms
USA
589 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2014 : 21:12:45
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Hi Mac1986,
I would not abandon what you have learned about medicine and your condition, just put it to one side and review it from time to time, this way you will become convinced that you have TMS and the cause of your pain can only be for psychological reasons.
It would be rash for you to make medical decisions on what you read here. It would be wise to make medical decisions on what you believe or what you come to believe since it’s your agenda and you are in control.
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
Posted - 11/14/2014 : 10:51:17
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| I am getting very frustrated which I know doesn't help anything but I keep getting my pain down a bit (not quite sure how) and that lasts a couple days then I have a major setback and it totally messes with my mind. I have had 2 periods of time where I have had my pain down. Both times it followed an epidural. First time was 4 days after and lasted 2 days the next time was 6 days after and lasted 1 day. However, I fully and 100% expected these to work and both times I made a decision to not be preoccupied with my symptoms. I did not improve until I decided I was going to get better. Now on the the setbacks... First setback was caused by another medical procedure which basically left me in bed for 3 weeks. There is really no reason it should of other than perhaps I unconsciously expected it to. So I was in great pain until my 2nd epidural. I have also been very depressed because of this pain. So 6 days after my 2nd epidural my dad was driving me to an appointment and gave me a pep talk of sorts and basically told me I need to force myself to be optimistic and just live one day at a time. He said I need to start expecting things to get better. I took his advice and took my kids to the park, played baseball and watched them ride their bikes. The pain that day was pretty bad but I powered through and kept a smile on my face. By evening the excrutiating part of the pain was gone. I am tempted to believe the epidurals are placebos and my attitude is driving my decreases in pain. So yesterday I had another setback. In the morning I woke up feeling great and ready to get back to living. My pain was minimal unless I did the things that typically aggravate it. However I messed up big time and attributed my feeling good to the epidural. I went back into my old habits of googling and making appointments to track down a physical cause. By then end of the day I was still feeling ok until my youngest daughter had a major meltdown. This is my biggest pain trigger. Since then my pain is back to status quo. Not good. I'm trying to convince myself it won't last. I do believe I need to recondition myself to the things that set my pain off. Not sure how to do this. The other issue is I still feel like I need to get another epidural to get me back on track. I am having a hard time letting go I suppose. I have been looking for advice on identifying triggers and working through them but haven't found a lot. Sorry for the rambling but anyone have any suggestions? I suppose if I can get my pain down without an epidural it will support tms. I guess that should be my goal. Any thoughts? |
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andy64tms
USA
589 Posts |
Posted - 11/14/2014 : 13:09:41
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Hi Mac1986,
I notice today is your appointment day with Mark Strom MD; I hope it goes well and he gives you direction. My advice is to let him guide you completely, especially about the epidurals. Asking for advice from cyber people is not advisable, and he is an MD and TMS expert. You need to be up front with him and mention your activity on this board. He may advise you to leave it for a while, as he knows TMS loves confusion and conflict.
As usual for new people here I see you did not answer miehnesor’s question: “Have you read Dr Sarno’s books”. Many of your concerns and issues are addressed in them. You should see yourself on every page and they should be a joy for you to read!
In my opinion, it would be beneficial for you and others to report back here with comments from your meeting with Mark, perhaps a written plan of action for you to take, but of course this is your choice.
Good Luck
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2014 : 10:04:06
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| So I met with Dr Strom last Friday and it went well. We have a lot in common so he is easy to talk to. The appointment itself was more of a therapy session. Kind of a get to know you. He has seem and treated pelvic pain before so that strengthens my confidence. I also felt confident because there was absolutely no sales pitch, no pressure for follow up appointment. He genuinely wants to help. He even gave me his cell number with permission to call anytime day or night (which I did more to follow). He is a retired head of cardiac surgery. Anyway I told him my story and we got into some family issues etc. he did a very basic physical exam and reviewed previous MRI ct scan etc. at the end he said "I don't usually speak with this much confidence but if you don't have tms no one does". I asked him about discontinuing physical treatments and he said the epidural won't do anything so don't schedule another one. He said as I gain confidence in my tms diagnosis I could stop physical therapy and other physical treatments. He said we will slowly wean meds as I start to feel better. He seemed to feel like I would start to feel better relatively quickly. After the appointment I got home and experienced the worst symptoms I have to date. I called him and he felt it was a good sign and that we were on to something with digging out repressed emotions. He also said he has no problem with me taking pain meds when things get really bad. I see him again Wednesday. |
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andy64tms
USA
589 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2014 : 10:45:54
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Hi Mac1986,
Thanks for posting back, its concise reports like this that gives encouragement to others. You also have done a great service to yourself by writing this one paragraph down, you can re-read it any time in the future to confirm what really happened, as TMS wants you to forget. Proof of this is the “worst symptoms I have to date” - hissy fit it gave you on return home.
I think TMS can be likened to a small child that has been bad and does not want you to find out. It will lie, cry and tantrum, It’s biggest fear is to be revealed. Treat this child with firmness, not anger, as with any child it has a personality of its own, get to know it and love it.
What books did he recommend?
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
Edited by - andy64tms on 11/17/2014 10:47:00 |
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tennis tom
USA
4746 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2014 : 11:30:28
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Good Mac, it went according to the Dr. Sarno prototcol, a long first interview (that you'll never get from an allopath doc) to discern personality and current issues (see Rahe-Holmes list). A sincere wish to help you personally and not to just treat you like a car on an assembly line.
Your pain afterwards is your sub-c rebelling against an assault on it's homeostasis (comfort zone), having to view the issue from TMS perspective and "think psychological" versus a structural outlook.
TMS'ers are lucky to have a doctor like Strom up in the North West and I may visit him when I'm up that way. Anyone with doubts about whether it's TMS or structural should drive a thousand miles to see him.
==================================================
TAKE THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS TEST
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale
Some of my favorite excerpts from _THE DIVIDED MIND_ :
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605
==================================================
"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." Jiddu Krishnamurti
"Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." Author Unknown
"Happy People Are Happy Putters." Frank Nobilo, Golf Analyst
"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint." Mark Twain and Balto
"The hot-dog is the noblest of dogs; it feeds the hand that bites it." Dr. Laurence Johnston Peter
"...the human emotional system was not designed to endure the mental rigors of a tennis match." Dr. Allen Fox
"Where ignorance is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise" - Thomas Gray
"All my friends in Los Angeles are the sensitive type. They all have like all the diseases like Chronic Fatigue, Epstien Barr, Fibromyalgia. Like all the diseases where the only symptoms seem to be you had a really crappy childhood and at the prospect of full time work ya feel kinda achy and tired."
Posted by Skizzik @ TMSHelp from comedian Maria Bamford
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"If it ends with "itis" or "algia" or "syndrome" and doctors can't figure out what causes it, then it might be TMS." Dave the Mod
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TMS PRACTITIONERS:
John Sarno, MD
400 E 34th St, New York, NY 10016
(212) 263-6035
Dr. Sarno is now retired, if you call this number you will be referred to his associate Dr. Rashbaum.
"...there are so many things little and big that are tms, I wouldn't have time to write about all of them": Told to icelikeaninja by Dr. Sarno
Here's the TMS practitioners list from the TMS Help Forum:
http://www.tmshelp.com/links.htm
Here's a list of TMS practitioners from the TMS Wiki:
http://tmswiki.org/ppd/Find_a_TMS_Doctor_or_Therapist
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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2014 : 09:57:38
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| So I'm having a lot of ups and downs and struggling to fully accept this is tms. I am getting better but have been having pretty major setbacks. My biggest issue is I recently found a ton of trigger points that reproduce a lot of my pain. I have been getting focused on those thinking that if I can get rid of those I would be better. I am also really struggling with fear. Due to this rare condition I have and the bleak outcomes I go through periods where I am terrified that my life is over and will never be pain free. I know my days are better when I stay positive but it is really hard to do so. I see dr strom again and am hoping for some good feedback. |
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andy64tms
USA
589 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2014 : 12:28:59
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Hi Mac1986,
You have a lot of seemingly serious stuff going on, but struggling is normal. I have just reread your whole thread; it would be wise for you to do the same since it is all about you. Basically stop whining start acting – Sorry.
“Pretty Major Setbacks” are indeed “pretty” as they are the mortar between the bricks of the wall of your recovery.
“A ton of trigger Points”. You are being greedy; just eat one at a time.
Who do you think you are? You don’t have a “Rare Condition”; you have TMS just like everyone else!
I suggest Diversion / Distraction:
Write a letter to your TMS, personify it / Give it a name. What do you think of it? Here are two of my examples:
Now I’m being silly
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=7290
Now I’m being silly 2
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=7451
U-tube also has an abundance of humor. Spend a whole day seeking out amusing videos and tag them, and I mean a whole day.
TMS has a fun side, embrace it.
Good luck
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
Posted - 11/21/2014 : 08:49:46
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Thanks Andy
That was helpful. I feel like if I could conquer my fear I could get the cns to calm down and stop sending do many pain signals. I guess I need to practice more mindfullness/ meditation. I wake up with a pounding heart and shaky hands. Not pleasant. Thanks again. |
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andy64tms
USA
589 Posts |
Posted - 11/21/2014 : 12:21:59
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Hi Mac1986,
When I first came to this forum, I was discouraged from using the word “conquering” fear, as it’s a combative word. I was encouraged to just understand fear for what it is. A response to keep us safe, as it makes us run from Saber tooth tigers etc.
President Roosevelt said: “the only thing we have to fear is fear itself”, he understood the wisdom of facing, embracing and understanding fear.
It might benefit you at this time to understand the difference between Fear and Anxiety. Look them up in Wikipedia or Dictionary as you may have a mixture of both.
View the shaky hands and pounding heart with thanks and excitement, for its reminding you that you have yet another day on this planet.
You are doing well keep going..
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 11/22/2014 : 11:01:54
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quote:
Originally posted by Mac1986
My biggest issue is I recently found a ton of trigger points that reproduce a lot of my pain. I have been getting focused on those thinking that if I can get rid of those I would be better.
Part of Dr. Sarno's physical examination includes palpitating these trigger points. If they produce pain, it is further evidence that the TMS diagnosis is correct.
You need to accept that the pain is caused by the brain in response to psychological issues. Dr. Sarno believes the pain is induced by reducing blood flow to the affected areas, and these trigger points are common in many TMS patients. |
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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2014 : 12:53:43
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Thanks guys
I have really been working on accepting emotions and deconditioning myself to situations that cause pain. I have searched the forum but remain confused on how I am to decondition myself to these situations. One thing I have found is that taking a shower is a trigger for my symptoms. I think this is because I was in the shower when I noticed my symptoms were starting. My question is now that I have identified the trigger and why it's a trigger how do I decondition myself to it? Thanks. |
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andy64tms
USA
589 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2014 : 13:52:19
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Hi Mac1986,
My symptoms are not evoked by triggers rather general every day stress, so I will leave the answer to Dave or someone else.
What I would do as an experiment would be to take baths and read a book that you like for a few days. If this is not possible perhaps take a nice hot shower with your wife. This will reveal if you have the same problem, and might help identify what psychological issues are in play. I’m told it’s your thinking that causes triggers.
Andy
Past TMS Experience in 2000, with success.
Charlie Horse on neck for 20 years, is almost gone.
Books:
Healing Back Pain
Unlearn your Pain
The Great Pain Deception |
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Dave
USA
1864 Posts |
Posted - 11/25/2014 : 09:59:18
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quote:
Originally posted by Mac1986
I have really been working on accepting emotions and deconditioning myself to situations that cause pain. I have searched the forum but remain confused on how I am to decondition myself to these situations.
It is simply a matter of repetition. Each and every time you are aware of the symptoms, disarm their ability to grab your attention. The goal is to remind yourself the symptom is benign and caused by psychological factors. You can disarm the symptom in various ways, you can figure out what works best for you. Dr. Sarno suggests to ignore the symptom and immediately shift your thoughts to the psychological realm--think about what might be troubling you that you might not realize or fully appreciate. Try to think of negative emotions that you would prefer not to feel. Admit that you are feeling these negative things despite your mind's attempt to distract you with pain. These feelings may be irrational, embarrassing, forbidden. Whatever they may be, explore them. Before long your mind will be off on a scavenger hunt trying to find these potential psychological triggers, and you will not be thinking about the pain anymore.
Whether or not you find the psychological trigger is irrelevant. It is the act of trying that is important. In fact, you can never really know what the psychological triggers are because by definition they are not conscious.
You can try different techniques provided they successfully shift your mind away from the pain. For example, you can laugh at the pain, and "tell your unconscious mind" you know what it is up to and won't allow it to succeed. You can engage in specific physical activity that targets the symptom and "proves to your unconscious mind" that despite the pain you are still fully capable of normal physical activity. Whatever it takes to convince yourself the pain is benign and ignore it.
The key is to find an approach and stick with it. Repetition is the key to the reconditioning process. It is going to take time. You need to be diligent and not frustrated by short-term setbacks. Trust that in the long-term the symptoms will fade on their own, as long as you are persistent and consistent in how you think about and react to them. |
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Mac1986
USA
17 Posts |
Posted - 12/21/2014 : 09:50:27
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| Is tms always based on Past emotions or do I need do be working on current emotions as well. For example how pissed I am about having this at age 28 and not being able to work. Im wondering if tms starts with an initial injury of some sort then emotions take over and the pain continues? Thanks |
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New here with some questions
